


Too Close

by GreenTeaz



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Canon Universe, Drama & Romance, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, M/M, mild smut i guess, yehyuk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 09:26:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 35,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25468516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenTeaz/pseuds/GreenTeaz
Summary: Sleepless Yesung visits a very tired Hyukjae in his room after a long day of work, and the situation gets slightly out of hand. With consequences for their friendship.
Relationships: Kim Jongwoon | Yesung/Lee Hyukjae | Eunhyuk
Comments: 96
Kudos: 147





	1. Sleep Does Not Always Come Easily

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sujuseries (Mythicalseries)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mythicalseries/gifts), [Angelpetal83](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelpetal83/gifts).



> Hello there! This is my first Yehyuk story and I haven’t written in a loong time. Actually, Super Junior and especially Yesung and Hyukjae caught my eye only recently, but I fell in love with their connection right away.  
> So please have mercy on my inexperienced SuJu- and writerssoul :)
> 
> And even though they are not aware of it, I allow myself to gift this fic @sujuseries and @angelpetal83, because they eventually were my motivation for writing this. So, thank you and I hope you can enjoy this first attempt! :)
> 
> Ps: And of course non of this is real, only created in the imagination of my mind.

Hyukjae falls onto his bed, he’s feeling exhausted and tired from the turbulent day. They had dance practice in the morning and shooting over midday until tonight. He snuggles into his blanket and as his head hits the pillow, he closes his eyes right away. There is only heavy tiredness filling his limbs and head and he can’t wait to slip away into nothingness and finally get some rest. He is almost fully asleep as he hears someone enter his room and lowly calling his name.

“Eunhyuk-ah?”.

Hyukjae doesn’t respond, he is drowsy, and he honestly doesn’t want to interact anymore with anyone tonight, his only desire to sleep. He grumbles quietly when one side of his bed dips down as someone sits on it carefully, and an almost husky voice whispers, “Hyukee?”. 

Hyukjae is aware that it is probably not possible to simply ignore the person who came into his room to sit at the edge of his bed, even though he showed no reaction to the call of his name. And while he is still pondering if he should open his eyes and talk to the intruder, said intruder starts to speak again.

“Hyukjae-ah!”, the voice is now a little more insistent and Hyukjae squints, turning his head a bit.

“Yesung? Hyung?”, he mumbles as he recognizes the slim figure at the edge of his bed. “What is it?”, Hyukjae asks, bemused about the late interruption from his hyung, while closing his eyes again and sinking back onto his pillow.

“I…”, Yesung doesn’t continue for a moment and Hyukjae sighs tiredly.

“Spit it out already, old man.”.

“Yah!”, Yesung perks up immediately and Hyukjae smiles lazily, _Gotcha._

“Might it be possible…I’m not able to fall asleep…”. The older one begins cautious then sighs heavily and goes on with a more confident tone, “Can I sleep here?”.

Hyukjae is a little bit surprised at the question. Then again, Yesung is known for walking around at night and visiting his members if he can’t sleep. It is still not a typical thing for him to ask Hyukjae if he can lie down beside him. Actually this scenario is a rather familiar but old one. In their earlier trainee years and also in their early active years when Yesung felt too much pressure from outside, he every now and then came to Hyukjae to talk, or to just lie quietly next to each other until they fell asleep. Later on or rather today it practically never happens.

_Is he not feeling well?,_

Hyukjae wonders but lifts up his blanket without a word, so his hyung can crawl under it and snuggle into bed beside him, their bodies turned towards each other.

“Thank you.” Yesung whispers and Hyukjae just nods shortly. It isn’t until now that he realizes he is only clad in his boxers, not even a shirt is covering his chest, but he is too tired to care and just breathes deeply once, before preparing to go back to sleep.

He startles slightly as he feels a hand on his naked thigh. Yesung is lightly feeling up the muscles in his leg and Hyukjae contemplates if he should say something or ask what the older man is doing all of a sudden, but then he figures that Yesung touching his thigh isn’t that special. The members actually do it all the time, mostly in shows or at interviews, they just feel the others strong legs and compare it to their own strength. Furthermore, if he is honest with himself the sensation isn’t really disturbing him either. And just when he has come to peace with his thoughts, he hears Yesung’s low voice again.

“Seriously, how are your thighs so strong and thin at the same time?”.

“It’s the training, hyung.” Hyukjae replies, not so much in the mood for a conversation, but he feels Yesung shaking his head. “My thighs get thicker if they get stronger.”.

“Well then, I guess I’m just special… or you’re doing something wrong.”, Hyukjae smirks and experiences a soft slap to his thigh and an appalled snort from Yesung’s side right away. 

They fall silent again and once more Hyukjae is practically back to dreamland when Yesung’s hand suddenly wanders past his thigh, over his hip and starts stroking his waist gently. With his fingertips he traces the lines to Hyukjae’s defined stomach and the latter feels himself slightly shudder.

 _What are you doing hyung?_ , he muses, as Yesung persistently caresses his abdomen, and he feels the need to shift his legs because he is sensitive to the touch. Finally, Hyukjae feels restless enough to decide to say something.

“Hyung, what are you doing?”.

“I’m sorry, I don’t want to keep you awake.”, Yesung apologizes immediately. “It’s just… how are you always eating so much but still have such a flat, defined tummy. And it feels soo soft on top of that…”.

Hyukjae can hear the sincerity in Yesung’s voice, even though he isn’t sure if Yesung is really telling what is troubling him at the moment. Nevertheless, he is almost sure to sense the carousel of thoughts in his hyungs head.

 _Is he concerned about his body again?_ _He is almost constantly thinking about his health, even though he has nothing to worry about_.

Despite taking these concerns of his hyung seriously, Hyukjae really is not in any state tonight to discuss such a delicate topic.

“Yesungie… I’m very much too sleepy for talking about this right now. You’re handsome and you have a beautiful body, all slim and elegant, you have no need for comparing yourself to me or anybody else. So please don’t, and now let me get some rest.”

When there is no response, Hyukjae barely opens his eyes and is immediately greeted with those of his hyung, since Yesung is already looking at him thoughtful and with a slightly widened gaze.

“What?”, Hyukjae asks, feeling a very bit unsure.

“It’s just something I don’t hear from you often, so straightforward.”, Yesung replies without any accusation.

Hyukjae shrugs, the earnestness of the conversation making him feel somewhat nervous.

“Makes it more meaningful though.”, he says and grins to loosen up the atmosphere and Yesung laughs quietly. Hyukjae relaxes again and has almost forgotten about the hand Yesung is still resting on his stomach, as the older one suddenly starts stroking his skin there once again.

Hyukjae doesn’t know what to do anymore. He doesn’t want to tell Yesung to stop, because the other seems to gain calmness from his occupation and the sensation isn’t unpleasant to Hyukjae either. Indeed Hyukjae feels himself being unable to not respond to the touch and he shortly worries about how much he will react if Yesung keeps this up, or even worse, intensifies it in any way.

Yesung doesn’t seem to notice the struggles he brings upon his dongsaeng through his actions and continues to peacefully trace Hyukjae’s stomach. Yesung is altering between placing more of his hand on Hyukjae’s body, to enhance the skin on skin contact and skimming just his fingertips over the delicate area, what causes Hyukjae’s stomach to flutter under the touch. Hyukjae frowns, his eyes still closed, he can feel the sensation spreading all the way to his groin.

_This. This is not good._

He is pretty sure he is half hard now, his legs are getting restless and he moves his feet together in an unsteady movement. What proves to be a mistake, as Yesung grabs Hyukjae’s thigh firmly to steady his motions, and the latter can only barely hold back a trembling intake of breath with the sudden strong grip around his leg.

“What’s wrong? Are you not lying comfortably?”, Yesung’s concerned low voice meets his ears.

“N-oh, no. Everything’s fine, I’m just trying to relax a bit more.”, Hyukjae lies.

“Okay.”. Yesung accepts the explanation and lets his hand, still pressed to Hyukjae’s skin, wander over his thigh upwards, and Hyukjae can’t stop himself from twitching, causing the older one to accidentally brush over his crotch, and this time Hyukjae is unable to stop the shaky intake of air.

They both freeze right away and neither one is saying a word. Hyukjae is only able to hear their breathing, which suddenly sounds way too loud in his room.

“It’s all right.”, Yesung eventually says tentatively. “I think it’s a very common reaction. I should have been more thoughtful when I touched you like this while we’ve had a busy day at work and a long time without any intimate physical contact.”

Hyukjae isn’t sure what he is supposed to answer, so he just nods and takes the way out Yesung is offering him so kindly.

However, this was enough embarrassment for him for tonight and he turns in his bed, lying down again with his back to Yesung, to hopefully, be finally able to get some sleep. Yesung, though, moves closer to his back and wraps one arm loosely around Hyukjae’s middle. Hyukjae can feel the other man inhaling and exhaling near his neck, causing goosebumps to form all over his skin, and Yesung’s body heat lightly enveloping his back, unleashes in him a longing to press his back further into the warmth of the other man.

_Really? How can this position be even worse than the one before._

Hyukjae almost whines loudly when he realizes that his body isn’t planning on calming down any time soon in this position.

_What the hell is wrong with me tonight?_

Yesung must have felt Hyukjae’s turmoil and begins to caress his side again, hand travelling over his waist to his hip, then his thigh and upwards again. His actions though, probably in an attempt of a soothing gesture, worsen Hyukjae’s current state, and he feels heat starting to pool in his stomach.

“What is it with your uneasiness tonight?”, Yesung asks innocently, but he doesn’t expect a response, instead he moves slightly away from Hyukjae’s back and lets one finger travel down his bare spine to his behind. And before Hyukjae can even process what is happening, Yesung’s hand suddenly touches his butt and starts kneading it softly.

“Look at this, how is your tushy so small and cute.”, his hyung giggles, presumably with the intent to lighten the mood, to make a joke and to help Hyukjae to get rid of his stiffness. Yet, the latter is absolutely terrified and stares with his eyes wide open at the wall in front of him.

“Hyung!” he breathes out, but Yesung only chuckles amused, not yet grasping the situation and the condition his dongsaeng is in.

“Seriously, Yesung hyung, what are you doing?”, says Hyukjae a bit more brisk. He is now actually annoyed at Yesung. First, he interrupts Hyukjae’s sleeping efforts, then his hand causes Hyukjae’s body to react crazily and now, when touching Hyukjae inappropriately like this, Yesung also has the audacity to laugh at him.

“Stop touching me like this. You already noticed how I’m reacting to it tonight.”, Hyukjae requires, and because he feels slightly embarrassed about his last sentence, and to hopefully shift the atmosphere with it, he adds, “Be responsible and have mercy on me, your helpless dongsaeng!”.

He awaits a cheeky response to his obvious ‘I-am-here-the-victim’ -play, but instead Yesung leans his upper body towards Hyukjae’s back, so the shirt covered chest of Yesung touches Hyukjae’s skin while he grabs the youngers butt more firmly. Hyukjae lets out a startled whimper as his bottom is being kneaded more thoroughly. He closes his eyes tightly and feels the heat spreading all over his face and body.

Yesung examines Hyukjae’s face for a second, the eyes which are squeezed together, the frown on the forehead and the flushed skin. His kneading of Hyukjae’s bottom is getting more sensual and Yesung swallows heavily.

His lips are near Hyukjae’s ear and as he begins to whisper, his lips brush softly against it.

“Hyukjae-aah~,”, Yesung murmurs, “am I allowed to do a bit more?”.

“Whhat?”, Hyukjae isn’t really aware of what is happening, but he feels himself shifting towards Yesung’s body almost automatically, as if his body has given in to the longing from before and finally made the decision prior to his head.

“I asked,”, Yesung repeats patiently, registering Hyukjae’s movement towards him. “If I can touch you a bit more?”.

Yesung has never stopped moving his hand over Hyukjae’s butt and at his last word he squeezes it determined. Even though Hyukjae doesn’t know what ‘more’ exactly means he feels himself timidly nodding his head.

“Is that a Yes? I need to hear this more clearly.”, Yesung insists.

“Yes…” Hyukjae whispers and he hears Yesung exhale slowly and controlled behind him, as if he has been holding his breath.

Then Yesung sits himself up in bed and onto his knees, and he rolls Hyukjae almost completely onto his stomach and without further ado pulls off his underwear.

“Aii…”, Hyukjae starts to protest loudly and tries to move away from Yesung’s hands, but he stops right away as Yesung begins to stroke and grab his ass fervently. Yesung’s soft caresses from earlier are now dominant, almost a bit desperate while his hands explore the youngers body.

Hyukjae feels tension gripping his body and he notices that he is pretty much instantly hard at the surprising and demanding touch. He can’t help the embarrassment travelling in form of heat throughout his body, which only intensifies, as one of Yesung’s hands wanders around his waist and grasps his hardness to give it a few tugs. His muscles cramp up and his breath hitches involuntarily, but he hopes it’s too faint for Yesung to hear.

Hyukjae feels overwhelmed and definitely not in control of the situation. He is on the verge of breaking off anything that is going further, and to tell Yesung that he really isn’t sure if he can handle this, as Yesung’s hand returns to Hyukjae’s back and the touches soften again. His hyung apparently sensing the overstraining he brings upon his dongsaeng.

Hyukjae is now lying fully on his front and Yesung is innocuously rubbing his slightly sore muscles in his back. The older one’s hands starting at Hyukjae’s lower back and massaging their way up to his shoulders and neck.

The younger loses his stiffness again and concentrates on the hands of his hyung on his skin. He feels a pleasant sensation spreading throughout his body and lets out an approving sigh, to which Yesung responds with a very light kiss between his shoulder blades, causing Hyukjae to shudder slightly.

Even though Yesung only mildly increases the pressure of his touches and focuses his actions mostly on Hyukjae’s back, while only rarely stroking over his ass, Hyukjae’s body is reacting constantly. His mind is incapable to think about anything else but that the hands on his skin belong to Yesung, and this knowledge alone sends repeatedly small shivers down his back. As Yesung begins to place tiny damp kisses all over his skin alongside his ministrations, it is getting difficult for Hyukjae to stay still, and he feels the need to rub his groin against the mattress to get a little bit of friction.

He tries to keep his movements as small as possible, not wanting to give Yesung the satisfaction that he indeed craves for more than the harmless exploration of his back. Yesung, however, notices the shifting right away and his hands grip Hyukjae’s hips to hinder his attempt to receive any release to the throbbing between his legs.

Hyukjae wriggles in the grip for a bit until he gives up and actually whines quietly in complaint.

Yesung turns him slightly around and leans his torso over the younger’s body until he is able to look at the sideways turned face of his dongsaeng.

“What’s wrong Hyukee?”, he murmurs soft but tauntingly, while using one of his hands to comb Hyukjae’s hair out of his face.

Hyukjae squints carefully and his eyes meet Yesung’s, for the first time, since they started this...

_What even is this?_

Hyukjae feels his chest flutter as he looks into the deep and dark but calm eyes of his hyung. Behind the challenging look he sees there, he recognizes something he probably has never seen before in these eyes, and his stomach flips in response to the desire he can identify in Yesung’s gaze.

“Are you okay?”, the older one asks suddenly, sounding worried and without stopping to affectionately comb Hyukjae’s hair.

To his utter despair Hyukjae can only whimper as a reaction to the question.

Yesung’s lips stretch into this warm little smile of his and he bends forward to kiss Hyukjae fondly on the cheek, and if the younger wouldn’t have been too embarrassed about it, he probably would have sighed approvingly.

Yesung’s lips slowly glide with small kisses towards Hyukjae’s ear and they shortly nibble at his earlobe before moving down to his collarbone and nipping and licking their way up along Hyukjae’s neck. Although, most of the touches still light, in between he plants passionate and demanding kisses on Hyukjae’s skin, which cause Hyukjae to slightly tremble and his breath to hitch every now and then.

He bites his bottom lip when one of Yesung’s upward movements enables Hyukjae to suddenly feel the others hardness on his hip, and he unwillingly lets out a needy gasp.

“Yesung…”.

The latter leans back and looks down on his dongsaeng, who is staring right back at him.

Hyukjae has lost everything of his typical sassiness, his eyes are wide open and slightly glistening, his lips shimmer red and wet from biting them while Yesung was kissing his neck, and Yesung feels a rush of heat and affection going through his body.

“Hyukjae-ah, I really want to make you feel good.”, Yesung says low and huskily without breaking eye contact.

The words seem to free Hyukjae from his paralysis and he groans, “Do you have to say it like this? Seriously hyung, this is so embarrassing.”. 

Hyukjae slaps a hand over his own forehead and closes his eyes.

Yesung just grins and without a warning he grabs Hyukjae by his hips, turns him fully onto his back while placing his legs so that Yesung is resting on his knees in between them. Then he takes the youngers cock with one of his hands, squeezing it shortly, before starting to give it quick decisive strokes.

Hyukjae almost screams, though, controlling himself at the last second all that comes out is an embarrassing shriek. He rips his hand away from his face and absolutely terrified he looks down, where Yesung’s hand is securely wrapped around his cock and moves without faltering in its motions.

“Oh my god, what are you doing?? Stop it, right now! What the hell…”, Hyukjae is unable to keep the mild panic mixed with aroused breathing out of his voice and Yesung stops his strokes to look at his face.

“This,”, Hyukjae struggles to find the words he wants to use. “This is too much… I – I’m really not sure if we should take this any further.”, it finally stumbles out of him.

Yesung doesn’t say anything for a moment, only studies him intently, and he is wearing this expression where Hyukjae is unable to tell what is going on inside his hyungs head. Hyukjae is uncomfortably aware of being thoroughly observed and of his still very hard cock being continuously grasped by Yesung’s hand. His eyes wander from Yesung’s face back downwards, and as the understanding dawns on him again that this is Yesung, his Yesung hyung, who is apparently willing to touch him like this without being aloof or shy in any way, he can feel his cock twitch in the others hold.

Hyukjae glances up in shock and is able to catch a very small knowing smile on the older ones face.

Yesung starts to carefully slide his hand over Hyukjae’s arousal again, his thumb lingering at the tip and circling it lightly. Hyukjae breathes in shallow and the throbbing in his crotch worsens.

Yesung leans himself forward, his face only inches away from Hyukjae’s.

“I’m sorry that this sounds so stereotypical, but you don’t seem to give me any other chance.”, Yesung nearly purrs in his husky voice. “So, if you really want me to stop, please use your superior dancing power and push me away.”.

Hyukjae just looks at Yesung with wide eyes, knowing that he should get back at his hyung for the implied teasing. Instead he feels himself holding his breath, unable to form words at the proximity of their faces, and when he isn’t saying anything back, Yesung continues by declaring again: “I really just want to make you feel good and it would make me so very happy if you let me.”.

Hyukjae is kind of glad about Yesungs corny words, because they always seem to shake him in a way he is able to think again.

“Aish… so cheesy, hyung!”, he can’t help himself but laugh a little and Yesung smiles at him as if he is proud of his achievement to say such a cheesy line, or maybe rather for getting Hyukjae to talk again.

There is this short moment where the two of them only stare at each other and Hyukjae feels himself turning nervous with the closeness of their faces, and he almost, just almost thinks about bridging the small gap to press his lips against Yesungs, but the thought never really crystallizes itself before the pressure around his cock increases again and Yesung lowers his head to lick over one of Hyukjae’s nipples before beginning to suck on it carefully.

Yesung is now much less prudent in his ministrations and soon Hyukjae feels himself squirm under the demanding but simultaneous teasing touches, licks and kisses on his skin. Yesung is flicking his tongue over one of Hyukjae’s nipples, while his right hand is pumping Hyukjae’s cock, only stopping sometimes to smear the by now leaking precum over the tip.

Still, Hyukjae keeps himself from making any noises except for his heavy panting, too ashamed about the thought of Yesung hearing him moan.

Yesungs unoccupied hand is roaming Hyukjae’s left thigh, and when he travels to the younger one’s bottom to slip between the mattress and Hyukjae’s butt, to give it a quick but firm squeeze, Hyukjae jolts unprepared and lets out a loud gasp. Yesung raises his head and stops his movements to examine Hyukjae’s face.

Hyukjae doesn’t want to imagine how he looks right now, his lips probably wet, his eyes unfocused and dazed due to the want and yearning he is feeling, and his hair in a mess spread out all over the pillow beneath him.

“What?”, he asks almost defiant.

“I want to hear you moan.”, Yesung states plainly.

“What?”, Hyukjae asks again, laughing slightly incredulous.

“You’re holding it back, aren’t you?”, Yesung persists. “You don’t want me to hear it because you think you would humiliate yourself.”.

“What?? No!”, Hyukjae tries to argue, but Yesung interrupts him right away.

“No, of course not, it’s not about embarrassment, it’s about teasing me, about not giving me the satisfaction to hear it, about not giving me a sign that you like it so much, isn’t that right?”, Yesung’s gaze is a mix of amusement and hurt and Hyukjae can only stare at his hyung for a second. How is Yesung able to be right and wrong with his guessing at the same time?

Though, before he can prepare a satisfying answer which would smother every further discussion referring to him moaning or not, Yesung crawls back a little, so he is not hovering over Hyukjae’s body anymore, and suddenly grabs Hyukjae firmly by his hips to turn him over onto is stomach in one swift and surprisingly strong motion.

Face down into the pillow, Hyukjae’s butt is being pulled up until he is resting on his knees, his behind and back exposed to the mildly cool air, without a blanket or Yesung’s warming body.

“Aish…”, Hyukjae mumbles into the pillow and tries to change his position, but Yesung holds him in place.

“Hyung!”, Hyukjae is turning his head sideways to be able to speak clearly.

“I liked you way better with this awestruck and needy look on your face from before.”, Yesung chuckles and Hyukjae feels himself blushing furiously as he additionally becomes aware of the position he is in right now.

“This is not funny!”, he complaints.

“True.”, Yesung answers.

He holds Hyukjae’s wrists now with one hand, while he is letting the other one wander over Hyukjae’s spine to his bottom. Then Yesung leans forward, so Hyukjae feels his hyung hovering over him again, and without any warning a hand wraps itself around his hard arousal and starts pumping it in a fast and steady, almost merciless pace.

Hyukjae lets out a strangled groan and thrusts into Yesung’s hand reflexively.

“Yah!”, Hyukjae pants out between Yesung’s harsh strokes. “What do you think you’re doing, slow down!”, at the end of his sentence Hyukjae is nearly unable to express himself without gasping and he feels himself getting dizzy from the stimulation and the attempt to restrain himself from moaning out loud.

“Please, hyung…”, he almost sobs and Yesung slows down his movements right away.

“Hyukee-, ‘you okay?”, Yesung blows a little bit of air onto his neck and kisses the spot right after.

Hyukjae doesn’t speak and only breathes deeply a few times, then he repeats, “What do you think you’re doing?”, and to his utterly despair, despite breathing in several times, his words come out as a whimper.

Yesung leans his upper body onto Hyukjae’s back, his hand never stopping the now slow and lazy strokes around Hyukjae’s cock, and Hyukjae notices for the first time that Yesung is ‘fully’ dressed in a shirt and boxers while he himself is completely naked.

He feels Yesung’s lips near his ear again and the older one whispers after placing a soft kiss behind Hyukjae’s ear, “I’m going to make you moan.”.

Hyukjae blinks with his eyes.

“What?”, he croaks, and he thinks he said this word way too often tonight.

“I’m going to make you moan. So, as much as I enjoy us two bickering, you can either keep going like this and I will tease you until you can’t hold it anymore, or you give in, let me touch you the way we both want me to and let me hear your beautiful noises.”.

Hyukjae is effectively speechless, and this is definitely not a familiar feeling to him at all. Then he closes his eyes, his focus automatically moving back to the hand sliding up and down his cock and Yesung’s light breathing on his neck.

“You’re still fully dressed.”, Hyukjae whispers so lowly that Yesung can’t hear him properly. 

“What did you say?”, his hyung mumbles in reply, lips still touching his skin.

“I said,”, Hyukjae speaks up a little, “you’re still wearing your clothes.”.

“So?”, Yesung answers, seeming to be a little bit puzzled.

Hyukjae sighs defeated. “Can you take off your shirt?”.

“Why?”.

Hyukjae knows, now Yesung is nothing but mocking him.

“Seriously, hyung!”, he therefore complaints briskly, and then adds with a shyness to his voice, “I want to feel your skin.”.

Hyukjae can’t believe how much these small words make his heart hammer in his chest. Yesung himself appears to be slightly caught off guard at the statement, but he doesn’t hesitate long and pulls of his shirt and Hyukjae knows, even though he isn’t facing Yesung, it is a grand gesture of trust, since Yesung always protects his naked figure very well from everyone around him.

Hyukjae thinks about trying to turn around again, to touch Yesung’s skin, to maybe leave small wet kisses on it as the older one did on his previously. However, before he can answer himself, if he is brave enough or let alone put his thoughts into action, Yesung is leaning his now bare chest over Hyukjae again and has his hand back in place to tease the tip of his cock.

Soon enough, Yesung’s grip strengthens around Hyukjae’s arousal while his other hand wanders aimless but desperately over the youngers body. Hyukjae has put his freed hands beside his face, so he is able to breathe properly, and rocks his hips in the rhythm of Yesungs strokes, acutely aware of the other one’s skin slightly rubbing over his back with their movements. His eyes are closed and he slowly gets lost in the intensifying pleasure he is feeling. His breathing is turning heavier and a small groan escapes his mouth, and he registers Yesung humming approvingly.

When Yesung stops not far before Hyukjae thinks he might be coming, he whines, not so quietly this time and Yesung chuckles lightly before letting both of his hands travel over Hyukjae’s back to his neck and back down.

“Hyukjae-ahh~” and even though the other purrs, Hyukjae knows exactly at the tone of Yesung’s voice that he wants something.

“What?”, Hyukjae pants.

_Definitely said too often._

“Where is your lube?”.

Hyukjae freezes right on the spot. “Wh-what?”, he stammers, his heart is beating fast in his chest.

“Your lube.”, Yesung repeats. “The stuff you use when you masturbate?”.

“I know what lube is!”, Hyukjae bits back annoyed.

“Oh, good. So…?”, Yesung just asks and Hyukjae is dumbfounded.

“So..? Hyung,”, he feels himself blushing madly, _ahh, this is unbelievable._ ”What do you need it for?”.

Yesung is quiet for a second, then a hand glides over Hyukjae’s neck soothingly.

“I won’t do anything you don’t want me to, or you don’t like. And of course nothing that might hurt you in any way.”.

Hyukjae exhales and his nervousness lessens.

“It’s in the third drawer of the nightstand.”, he mumbles and fidgets slightly as Yesung shortly leaves his side to open said drawer and to grab the lube.

“Yesung –”, Hyukjae starts hesitantly.

“Yes?”.

“I- I really don’t have any experience in this…”, Hyukjae doesn’t even know why he is saying this when he already feels as if his ears might drop off from being so hot of embarrassment. 

“That’s all right. I will be careful and you just tell me what you like or what you don’t.”, Yesung says reassuringly.

Meanwhile he has opened the bottle and spreads some lube onto one finger of his left hand. Then he grabs Hyukjae’s hard cock with his other hand and starts stroking him once again.

Hyukjae mewls quietly and all his attention is steered back to Yesung’s hand between his legs until he can feel Yesung’s finger running softly over his entrance, before pushing carefully only the tip of it in. Hyukjae shakily breathes in at the unfamiliar feeling, though it’s not an unpleasant one.

He feels Yesung carefully circling his entrance, massaging his insides lightly and Hyukjae squeezes his eyes shut while gripping the sheets beside his head.

Hyukjae notices how he is unconsciously moving his hips backwards against Yesung’s digit after a moment of getting used to the new sensation, and Yesung, sensing Hyukjae’s wish, slowly pushes forward and slips his finger all the way in. He then begins to move in and out of Hyukjae in a slow pace, and the latter now can’t help the quiet but relentless moans escaping his mouth.

At first Hyukjae is glad about Yesung’s thoughtfulness but soon he experiences the slow thrusts more as taunting then satisfying, particularly because Yesung strokes his cock in the same slow pace as he thrusts into Hyukjae. He starts to squirm in the hope to feel more or to motivate Yesung to move faster.

The older one notices the wriggling and teasingly asks, “What is it? Do you want more?”.

“Can’t you tell without asking?”Hyukjae pants irritated, raising his head to make the breathing and talking easier.

“But I like talking to you and even more I’d like to hear you asking for more. Of course, you can beg as well.”, Yesung slows down his thrusting a little and releases Hyukjae’s cock for a second to slide his hand over the other’s back.

“Hyung, please, don’t play games now.”, Hyukjae openly whines, and he groans right after as Yesung hits an especially sensitive spot inside him. However, before he can say ‘do that again’, Yesung withdraws his finger completely and enters him again with a second one beside the first. Hyukjae feels himself being stretched and gasps slightly while he is adjusting to the intrusion. Yesung scissors his fingers for a moment before rubbing Hyukjae’s walls extensively.

Hyukjae is moaning quietly, feels himself pulsating around the two digits and his hands travel aimlessly over the bed until he grabs the sheets again tightly.

“Does it feel good? Am I making you feel good?”, Yesung dares to tease and Hyukjae wants to yell at him for being cheeky in a situation where he presents himself so vulnerable to his hyung.

“It probably would if you would do a better job at it.”, Hyukjae therefore grits out, and regrets it right away as Yesung snorts and starts to move his digits in and out, speeding up his movements without waiting any longer for Hyukjae to adjust. Not fully comfortable with the feeling of two fingers inside him Hyukjae wants to say something, but instead Yesung hits this sensitive spot inside him again.

“Oh God!”, the younger is unable to keep himself from moaning out loud, and when Yesung hits the spot straightaway again Hyukjae is only able to let out a breathless “Fuck, please.”.

“Ohh, Hyukee, you’re doing so well. Make that sound again will you, babe?”, Yesung says hoarsely, his words meant to be teasing, but his arousal over Hyukjae’s moans causing him to end the sentence with a groan on his own.

Hyukjae feels himself clenching around Yesung’s fingers at the endearment and in place of a moan he whimpers, feeling a little humiliated because of his reaction to the simple nickname and the praise.

“What? You like me calling you this? Babe? Or that you’re taking it so well?”, Hyukjae can practically hear the smile in Yesung’s voice.

“Who would have thought… I definitely didn’t expect you to have a little praise kink.”, the older one says more to himself.

And before Hyukjae can argue or process at the edge of his consciousness, if this means that Yesung had thought about doing this already before coming to Hyukjae’s room tonight, Yesung hits the sweet spot inside him again, which makes Hyukjae moan at least as uncontrolled and loud as before.

Yesung doesn’t slow down now, he picks up his movements around Hyukjae’s cock and thrusts his fingers unforgivingly in and out, while continuously hitting the sensitive spot inside of Hyukjae. Hyukjae registers Yesung’s intention to pursue his climax, but even if he’d want to, he isn’t able to fight it, instead he is quietly begging Yesung for more in between his helpless moans. His legs starting to tremble from the anticipation and Hyukjae arches his back.

“Ye- sung!”, his moan almost a sob, and Hyukjae’s voice breaks around Yesung’s name when he finally tips over the edge and spills himself all over Yesung’s hand. 

Hyukjae sees stars in front of his closed eyes, his whole body buzzing and his blood rushing in his ears with the aftermath of his orgasm, and he doesn’t move for several moments.

Yesung pulls his fingers out of Hyukjae and the latter frowns at the whimper that escapes his lips. He hears Yesung standing up and moving around the room and suddenly something cold and wet touches his skin and he registers Yesung cleaning him up carefully.

Yesung gently lies him onto his side and cleans his chest and stomach before he very softly moves the wet tissue over Hyukjae’s sensitive groin and behind as well. Hyukjae watches him doing it and he can’t help it that his thoughts come raining down on him.

_I feel so… good. What the actual fuck just happened?_

_Look at Yesung hyung being so tender. And beautiful._

_I really like it when he is taking care of me like this._

_Actually, I didn’t take care of him at all…_

Hyukjae dares to glance down towards Yesung’s groin and he can see the clearly visible outline of the older ones arousal straining against the fabric of the boxers Yesung wears instead of pajamas. Hyukjae’s stomach flips, and he is shocked how much the sight affects him even though he just came.

_Am I supposed to… No. Oh god, no. I would embarrass myself completely, if I would try anything._

_And anyway, I didn’t ask for any of this._

_What did he even think coming in here and starting this… mess?_

Hyukjae can only lie there and feel fearfully how the insecurity and uneasiness come rushing back to him. When Yesung lifts his head, he quickly closes his eyes to not meet the ones of his hyung.

After Yesung has cleaned everything up, he moves Hyukjae over a bit, tugs him into the covers and lies down behind him. Yesung wraps his arms around Hyukjae and the latter attempts to calm down his racing thoughts and tries to ignore the throbbing of Yesung’s hardness he can lightly feel against his back.

However, after a short moment of appearing peacefulness, Hyukjae feels the heavy tiredness rushing back over him, and he notes that he is practically not capable of grasping one clear thought. Nevertheless, he pulls himself together and says, with a hoarse voice, “…Hyung –“, but Yesung interrupts him, feeling the tiredness of Hyukjae and his own troubling thoughts paired with sleepiness.

“We can talk tomorrow, sleep now Hyuk-ah. I’ve kept you awake long enough and you’re clearly exhausted.”.

At first he wants to argue with Yesung, but as Hyukjae tries to formulate his next sentence, his mind already slips away and he falls asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually only the first chapter of a story I'm having in mind, but I'll share it with you already, because I'm curious of what you think. :'3 And of course feel free to leave comments or kudos, they are always appreciated :)


	2. This Morning is a Mess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I'm back again and I have to say, I feel soo overwhelmed with all the positive feedback you left me! Thank you so much, really! :)) <3
> 
> Short disclaimer for this chapter:  
> I avoid to mention actual album releases or concrete schedules, so the story is more freely writeable for me. Still, I imagine the setting of this story in 2019/2020 even though I know that they are no longer living in the dorm together. 
> 
> Just in case some of you haven't seen the Rockstar performance I'm writing about in this chapter, I will ad the link here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-TovWMggnrE
> 
> So, I leave this here and hope you enjoy the second chapter as well! :)  
> 

Hyukjae wakes up because someone is lightly shaking his shoulder.

“Hey, sleepyhead. Wake up, will you? You have to get ready, we will leave soon for the shooting appointment today.”, Donghae’s soft voice pierces through Hyukjae’s clouds of sleepiness. He grumbles, wraps the blanket tightly around himself and turns further away from his best friend.

“Eunhyukee, come on, wake up. Aren’t you normally one of our early birds? And you went to sleep yesterday right away, how can you be so sleepy?”, Donghae wonders and shakes his head.

Hyukjae’s answer sounds like a growl, though still not nearly as intimidating as he wished it to be and Donghae just chuckles at him.

“No complaining! You need to wake up now, you’re the last one to get up!”.

Donghae decides to take stronger actions and tries to pull at the covers. Hyukjae, gripping the sheets reflexively, starts simultaneously kicking his legs at Donghae in the hope to strike his friend and to be left alone, to maybe get some more sleep.

However, Donghae only snickers and with a harsh drag he rips Hyukjae’s blanket down, over his shoulders, chest and waist, until his body is only covered from his hips downwards.

“Yah!”, Hyukjae protests loudly, his eyes fly open and he adjusts the covers so that his hipbones aren’t visible anymore.

Donghae looks at him surprised, then he starts to laugh out loud.

“Are you naked? For real?”.

Hyukjae rolls his eyes at his friend. “So what if?!”.

Donghae shakes his head again. “At least you’re awake now. We have to leave soon, so hurry up and don’t fall asleep again!”. Donghae lifts himself up and moves to leave the room.

While rubbing his hands over his face to get himself to fully wake up, Hyukjae notices something nagging at the back of his mind. He blinks his eyes and looks to the right side of his bed, and while he slides a hand over the empty space there, the memories of last night come crashing down on him.

He feels himself blushing at the things his mind reminds him of and he shyly lifts the blanket to glance at his crotch. Slowly he lets one of his hands drift towards his groin, past his soft manhood, and with his fingers he carefully fumbles his entrance. He shudders as he feels the evidence that the sensitive area of his body truly seems to have been stretched before.

_So it happened for real?_

Hyukjae pulls his hand back as if something had struck him. His heart starts to beat fast as single images and emotions from the night are beginning to rush through his head.

_Why is he not here? Why didn’t he stay? He said we’d talk in the morning…_

Hyukjae feels an uncomfortable tightening in his chest, and emotions he isn’t used to are starting to spread throughout his whole body. He instantly tries to shake off the feeling of humiliation and embarrassment.

_Why is he not here?_

He asks himself again, but before he is able to get completely lost in his troubling thoughts, the door of his room opens again and Donghae pops his head in.

“Hey, ahh, you’re up, that’s good! Come on, have some breakfast.”, his friend says and Hyukjae struggles shortly to connect himself to the current situation again.

“I’m not hungry.”, he murmurs distracted and Donghae’s eyebrows raise unbelievably high on his forehead.

“What?”, Donghae slips through the door, closes it quietly behind himself and takes a few steps in the direction of the bed.

“Are you not feeling well? Do you feel sick?”, his friend asks him, worry clearly audible in his voice.

Hyukjae pulls himself together and lifts his head. “No, no, everything’s alright. I’m fine! I’m coming in a second, just… you know, need to grab some clothes.”, and contrary to his inner state he chuckles.

Donghae examines him cautiously for a moment, then he smiles and nods, but makes no attempt to leave the room.

Hyukjae watches him expectantly, and as he notices that Donghae isn’t planning on moving he clears his throat soundly.

“I know, we’ve seen a lot from each other, but you remember that I’m naked right now beneath this blanket? And even though I’m mostly comfortable being naked in front of you, I’d really appreciate the privacy.”.

_____________________________________________________

Hyukjae saunters into the kitchen area. He’s wearing sweatpants and has chosen one of his bigger sweaters to feed his need of hiding at least as much as possible.

As he strolls in and scans the room real quick to check for Yesung’s face, he breathes in relieved as he notices that his hyung isn’t there. Instead, Leeteuk, Donghae and Siwon sit around the kitchen table, all three dressed and obviously ready to leave the dorm any minute for their shooting appointment.

“Hey little zombie, you like to eat some breakfast? We saved you some food.”, Leeteuk smiled at Hyukjae.

Latter is still protecting his face with his hoody, just in case he would have met Yesung in the kitchen and wouldn’t have been able to pretend the emotions traveling through his facial expressions.

He doesn’t really look up at Leeteuk and says hoarsely “I think I just go with some tea today.”.

He can feel the surprised eyes on him even before he raises his head to gift his friends with a polite smile. He meets Donghae’s frown, but he doesn’t hold his gaze and turns to heat up some water for the tea. Hyukjae knows anyway that his best friend is aware of something being wrong with him, hell, probably Siwon and Leeteuk noticed as well. It’s not like Hyukjae is acting totally unsuspicious.

_Way to play it cool, Hyukjae._

He sighs inwardly, and with the steaming cup of tea in his hands, he moves over to the breakfast table and slides into the seat next to Leeteuk.

“So,”, Hyukjae knows, if he wants to avoid questioning looks and uncomfortable conversations he has to step up his game of playing unbothered.

“Anybody knows if the shooting today is still only for the next album cover or already for the teaser of our first MV of the new album?”, he asks his members.

Leeteuk, instantly switching from wondering looks to actual leader behaviour, starts explaining the schedule of today’s shooting as far as he knows to Hyukjae. As Siwon points out that he is interested in what they will wear for today’s photoshooting, Donghae and Hyukjae join in with silly styling advices. And soon enough Hyukjae’s tension is fading, he begins to relax in his chair, sips his tea and tells Siwon he should suggest to the staff that they should add some sexy horse bit to his outfit, what causes Donghae to break into a fit of childish giggles.

Leeteuk smiles silently over his dongsaengs boyish antics until his glance catches the time on his phone, which is lying on the table in front of him.

“Aii, guys, pack up the stuff you need for today, the van is picking us up in fifteen minutes.”

Hyukjae turns his head, eyes wide. “Whaat? Shit.. I wanted to take a shower before we leave!”.

“Well then, skip or hurry up I guess.”, Siwon laughs.

Hyukjae jolts from his seat and plunges through the door to his room. He grabs a towel, a fresh pair of boxers, some pants, a shirt and without really looking another sweater.

He cannot go without taking a shower, because… well, he just really is in the need of a shower.

When Hyukjae rushes across the hall towards one of the bathrooms, he almost crashes into Kyuhyun.

“Sorry!”, Hyukjae pants out while turning around and lifting his arms loaded with his clothes and towel in an apologetic gesture.

“No problem, though, watch where you’re going Eunhyuk hyung, you might fall over your own feet in that hurry.”, Kyuhyun grins and starts walking curiously towards the kitchen as there is suddenly yelling and laughter to hear from there.

Hyukjae faces the direction of the bathroom again, he is only two meters away.

Though, between him and the bathroom door, out of nowhere, is standing the person he really wants to see the least at the moment.

Yesung is completely dressed, ready to leave the house. His bag hanging over his right shoulder and his sun glasses sitting on his perfectly, fluffy styled, raven black hair. A few strands fall into his face and the piercing brown eyes catch Hyukjae’s, holding onto them.

Hyukjae’s heart is instantly beating faster and he feels the tenseness float back into his body. He knows, he is staring. Staring for way too long. However, he can’t seem to bring himself to react in any other possible manner.

“Hyukjae-ah~”, Yesung begins to speak, but he gets interrupted through a fit of laughter from the kitchen.

Yesung shortly looks disrupted in the direction of it. The break of eye contact and the noise from the other members releases Hyukjae from his paralysis and he stammers out,

“I really don’t-, we’re about to leave and I really have to take a shower before, because..”, he aborts the rest of the sentence as Yesung looks at him again. His words hanging in the air between them and Hyukjae feels himself starting to blush as he thinks what the ‘because’ in his sentence implicates.

Though, this time he frees himself way faster from his stiffness and he jerkily turns away from Yesung to finally enter the bathroom.

“Hyukjae!~”, Yesung’s voice is slightly insistent and Hyukjae, already facing the bathroom door, freezes on the spot and shudders as it reminds him of the night before, where Yesung was sitting at the edge of his bed and tried to wake him up. And when Hyukjae had no idea what would follow.

Before Yesung is able to continue, Ryeowook appears on the screen, strolling through the hallway, eyebrows raised.

“Anyone able to tell me what the hell is going on in the kitchen?”, he asks Hyukjae and Yesung.

Yesung, evidently irritated by now, tries to keep the edge out of his voice as he answers.

“Actually, no idea, maybe you should check it out and see what noisy feast they hold without us.”.

Hyukjae doesn’t even hesitate one second. As he hears and spots Ryeowook in the hallway he pushes down the door handle and literally flees into the bathroom. He throws his things onto the bathtub brink and hurriedly locks the door. Then he breathes in deeply and discards his clothes onto the floor.

When the water hits his skin, his body is beginning to feel at ease again and he can’t help but shake his head under the stream of water over this whole situation he finds himself in.

_______________________________________________________

Hyukjae is logically the last one to leave the dorms. He hurries down the stairs, hair still slightly wet and his tight, although a little too loose jeans hanging low on his hips, due to the fact he didn’t grab a belt.

When he reaches the van, everyone has already chosen a seat and Hyukjae can’t help the relief flooding through him as Donghae pats a space next to him, a sign for Hyukjae to sit down beside his friend.

Hyukjae crawls into the car and of course he noticed where Yesung is sitting, but he avoids looking anywhere near this direction and just flops down onto his seat.

Donghae instantly starts to chatter with him about some tweet Heechul apparently posted this morning and soon they lose themselves in one of their typical discussions about Hyukjae definitely not posting enough on social media.

_______________________________________________________

Yesung sits farther in the back of the van. He feels his heart skip, as Hyukjae joins the rest of the group, lastly, but with damp hair and washed out, low riding jeans, which he pulls up before climbing into the van.

Yesung searches for his eyes, but the younger one doesn’t even look in his direction and shows a pleased expression as Donghae gestures for him to sit down.

Yesung cannot help the sting it sends right to his heart. He is strained as he leans his head at the backrest and closes his eyes. A frown almost immediately forming on his forehead.

Ryeowook, sitting next to Yesung, gives him a concerned glance and quietly speaks up.

“Hyung? ‘You okay?”.

Yesung doesn’t open his eyes, he really feels unable to meet Ryeowook’s gaze without giving away that something is bothering him.

“I’m fine, just kinda sleepy.”.

“Didn’t get much rest again last night?”, Ryeowook digs deeper.

“Yeahh.. I just try to use the ride to catch up on some sleep, I think.”, Yesung answers evasive.

Ryeowook nods his head even though Yesung isn’t able to see. The silence that follows allows Yesung to hear the indistinct chatter of Hyukjae and Donghae in the front. His frown deepens as he listens to Hyukjae laughing and defending himself energetically in front of Donghae.

He attempts to block out their voices, but when he fails, he resolutely reaches for his earphones, plugs them in and lets soothing music fill his ears and mind.

It allows him finally to let his mind drift off, but he is unable to keep his thoughts from wandering to the last few weeks and the situation of last night.

________________________________________________________

_Yesung_ _lies in his bed, eyes wide open. He feels unsettled, way more than usual. Why? Because he feels overwhelmed by so many things at once at the moment._

⊱ ⊶ ⊹ ⊷ ⊰

> _They had been all moving back into the dorm a few weeks prior. Kyuhyun, Ryeowook and Hyukjae already staying there together, Leeteuk thought it would be a good idea for them all to live together again, as a group._
> 
> _His leader was thinking about their newly upcoming album and of course their also included following come back. Every member was pursuing their own solo or sub-unit projects by now and their time together as a group kept getting shorter._
> 
> _If Yesung is honest, he wasn’t very excited in the beginning. Living in the dorm together meant to see each other every time they came home from schedules, regardless if they had an appointment as group, sub-unit or alone. And even though he considered his members as family, he was slightly worried if they would get along after so much time had passed since they hang out a lot as a whole._
> 
> _He was proven wrong, well at least regarding the others. Especially his dongsaengs seemed to flourish in the presence of the other members. Leeteuk also appeared to be happier, more… balanced and less worried about everything._
> 
> _However, referring to Yesung, it turned out to be a living hell._
> 
> _When they settled in together and spend the first night eating and talking with one another until they went to bed, because most of them had schedules the next day, he firstly thought that it might actually not be so bad. He felt comfortable with his friends, he felt safe._
> 
> _Though, a few days later, maybe after one week, he felt himself getting slightly restless. He contemplated if it was the unfamiliar amount of people around him so frequently, respectively in the evenings. Because he was in general a rather introverted character and needed his space and quietness._
> 
> _Anyhow, he soon noticed that this was absolutely not at all the reason for his uneasiness._
> 
> _It wasn’t as if he had never become aware of the connection he and Hyukjae shared, after all they were really good friends, since the beginning of their trainee days. And Yesung had found himself more than once drawn to the younger one for support. Hyukjae was quite a reflected and mindful person, even though his dongsaeng is way more extroverted, Yesung knows Hyukjae good enough to be aware of him being not half as carefree and thoughtless as he presents himself to be in front of the cameras._
> 
> _Yesung_ _is actually kind of poor in stopping his mind to go in circles over and over and he of course had very carefully scratched the surface of the thought, if his feelings for Hyukjae have the same nature as the one he has for Ryeowook, Kyuhyun or the other members._
> 
> _It remained at the scratch on the surface._

⊱ ⊶ ⊹ ⊷ ⊰

_Right now, lying here in his bed in his room, he wonders why and he ponders if it was just too much going on for him to dig deeper into this idea. Maybe though, he just wasn’t ready for what he would find there._

⊱ ⊶ ⊹ ⊷ ⊰

> _One recent morning at the dorm, Yesung was already sitting in the kitchen and slurping on his hot cup of coffee, as Hyukjae stumbled in, clad only in t-shirt and boxers, his face still affected by drowsiness and his bare feet tapping over the floor._
> 
> _“Morning.”, he mumbled and shuffled over to the water kettle to make himself some tea._
> 
> _“Morning.”, Yesung had murmured in return, his eyes strangely glued to Hyukjae’s legs._
> 
> _Yesung’s_ _gaze travelled over his thighs, his behind, up his back, which emerged itself slightly through the white transparent t-shirt and when Hyukjae turned around with his cup securely wrapped between his hands, Yesung’s eyes couldn’t move away from his torso. He felt himself swallowing heavily around a sudden lump that built up in his throat._
> 
> _>_ What is going on? _<_
> 
> _Yesung_ _tried to tear his eyes away, but it was impossible. He followed the lines of Hyukjae’s slightly visible abs under the shirt and stopped at the waistband of the boxer shorts. When his eyes traced the outline of the place where Hyukjae’s cock was safely hidden by the clothing he tried to swallow again, but his mouth felt very dry all of a sudden and heat was spreading throughout his body._
> 
> _Hyukjae_ _, too sleepy to notice his hyungs wandering eyes, crossed the kitchen to slump into the seat across from Yesung._
> 
> _After Hyukjae had started talking to him and Kyuhyun joined them in the room not much later, Yesung almost forgot about him noticing so much about Hyukjae’s body._
> 
> _Though, long after, in the evening when he was alone in his room, lying on his bed, his thoughts went back to the incident in the morning and he wondered how his reactions had something to do with seeing Hyukjae like this. After all it wasn’t as if he had never seen his dongsaeng being dressed like this. Hell, he had seen way more of Hyukjae’s body in the past years. It’s not as if his dongsaeng is very modest about showing off his physical features, in contrast to Yesung himself._
> 
> _Over the next days, Yesung observed his own behaviour. He noticed his lingering eyes on Hyukjae, his urge to make physical contact as often as possible and the worst part, he couldn’t prevent himself from imagining how it would feel to touch Hyukjae. To feel his body, to see his face very close to his own, to intimately connect their eyes…_
> 
> _Yesung_ _shook his head to banish his unhelpful and troubling thoughts and to get himself to focus on the situation in front of him. Donghae, Shindong, Siwon and Hyukjae were sitting on the couch in the living room. The TV was turned on and they were obviously watching one of their Super Junior performances, though Yesung had been too caught up in watching Hyukjae to notice what exact performance was gluing their eyes to the screen._
> 
> _He examined Hyukjae’s face, his laugh, his hands, which stroke excited over his in jeans clad legs and his little bouncers on the couch, if he couldn’t keep himself from getting too hyped over a certain moment in a video._
> 
> _Yesung_ _was lingering in the doorway of the living room and eventually Donghae noticed him standing there._
> 
> _“Hey, hyung, join us! We’re watching old performances!”._
> 
> _Shindong_ _, Siwon and Hyukjae’s eyes left the TV and they made agreeing noises to Donghae’s request._
> 
> _So, Yesung pushed himself off where he had leaned on the door and slowly strolled over to his members, positioning himself behind the couch, propping his hands on the backrest._
> 
> _“What stage are you watching?”, he asked casually._
> 
> _However, when he lifted his gaze to the screen, the question presented itself to be unnecessary as he spotted their well-known Rockstar performance from 2013 in Seoul._
> 
> _“Really?”, he laughed out loud. “Are you serious? How narcissistic are you guys?”._
> 
> _“Aii! We’re not narcissistic! It was just a hell of a performance and we all had a lot of fun that day on stage. You know it!”, Donghae defended them instantly._
> 
> _Hyukjae_ _chuckles. “What are you talking about? I definitely want to see us taking off our shirts, isn’t it about to appear in a second anyway?”._
> 
> _Normally Yesung would have scolded Hyukjae for his shameless arrogance, even though he knew that his dongsaeng didn’t mean it and probably just wanted to be cheeky and tease Yesung a bit. Though, the words of Hyukjae sinking in, he felt himself getting nervous._
> 
> _>_ Shirtless Hyukjae? No. Not a good idea. Really, not good _. <_
> 
> _Yesung_ _tried to think up a good excuse why he suddenly didn’t have any more time to watch the video, but he found himself tied to the spot and unable to move or look away from the screen._
> 
> _When Hyukjae and Donghae pulled off their t-shirts on TV, Siwon and Shindong began to cheer and right after the four of them broke out into a fit of laughter._
> 
> _Yesung_ _on the other hand didn’t feel like laughing at all. His eyes were captivated by the scenery in front of him and he couldn’t look away from the half-naked Hyukjae on screen. He finally managed to tear his gaze away and with a simple_
> 
> _“You’re all brats.”, he left the room._

⊱ ⊶ ⊹ ⊷ ⊰

_Yesung_ _remembers vividly how the following days went by. He had found himself struggling over his reactions to Hyukjae more and more and one morning he woke up to a hardness between his legs. He had buried his head in his hands this morning and soon after he had left the dorm, only returning late at night._

_He had tried to avoid Hyukjae as much as possible without the younger one noticing something being wrong. The last thing he wanted was Hyukjae to think Yesung had a problem with him. After all, the problem he had stumbled upon wasn’t exactly Hyukjae, but more like the sudden reactions of himself to seeing his dongsaeng._

_Though, with all the other challenging events that are going on at the moment, their comeback, MV shootings, K.R.Y album preparations and so on, Yesung feels himself missing the closeness to Hyukjae even more than usual._

_He closes his eyes in an attempt to calm his racing mind, but he notices himself being unable to succeed._

_>_ Maybe I should just talk to him for a bit. As in earlier times. Just lying next to him and talking about things and hopefully fall asleep for a little while _. <_

 _Yesung_ _isn’t sure if he really has just talking in mind as he sits himself up in his bed, ready to head over to Hyukjae’s room. Deep down he craves for a touch, for contact, something he hasn’t allowed himself to seek lately, after starting to avoid Hyukjae for the best. All this avoiding thing was anyway only his desperate attempt to willing the newly developed emotions away. Hopeless, as he knows by now._

_When he sneaks through the hallway and knocks on Hyukjae’s door, he feels as if he is doing something forbidden and his heart starts to beat strangely fast._

_He gets no reaction to his knocking, so he opens the door slowly and peeks into the dark room. Hyukjae is obviously already asleep._

_Yesung_ _sits down onto the bed and after calling Hyukjae’s name repeatedly the younger one blinks at him and mumbles out a “What is it?”._

_“I…”, Yesung struggles, he is suddenly no longer sure what he actually wants, and wether it is even okay for him to ask Hyukjae to lie down next to him after they haven’t done this for a long time._

_As Hyukjae taunts him and Yesung automatically falls back in his defence-mode, his inner turmoil calms down a little. He knows this, he knows Hyukjae, he is comfortable and safe here._

_When Yesung is snuggled up under the blanket beside his dongsaeng, he reaches out for the other one’s thigh, just for the light contact he is longing for so much._

_He starts talking to Hyukjae even though he notices the heavy sleepiness of his dongsaeng, but he needs this right now. This light conversation, their usual although harmless banter._

_When he accidently brushes over Hyukjae’s groin and they both freeze, his thoughts begin to race through his mind. However, he calms the younger one down, trying to tell himself that Hyukjae’s reaction isn’t directly connected to him touching his dongsaeng._

_He even tries to lighten the mood as he observes Hyukjae turning away and obviously not being totally fine with what happened right now. Though, touching Hyukjae’s bottom may have not been the smartest move to do so._

_Yesung_ _doesn’t know what is rushing over him, but when Hyukjae agress to let Yesung touch him, to act on Hyukjae’s slight arousal, Yesung’s head feels dizzy and his hands urge to trace every line of skin on Hyukjae’s body._

_As Hyukjae lies naked in front of him Yesung’s control is slipping away, something that rarely happens. Though, he realizes, when it happens it is usually in interaction with Hyukjae._

_Still, he notices Hyukjae being overwhelmed and slows down his motions._

_“Yesung…”, Hyukjae lets out a needy gasp and Yesung leans back to look down on him._

_“Hyukjae-ah,”, Yesung’s heart is beating so fast in his chest that it feels as if it’s going to stumble any second. “I really want to make you feel good.”._

_There is this moment, where Yesung thinks Hyukjae will break everything off, but Yesung is too far gone and as Hyukjae’s cock twitches in his hand he knows, he won’t stop this. He overstepped the line already anyway._

_Hyukjae_ _asking him to get rid of his shirt throws him shortly off track. And he feels warmth pooling in his stomach in addition to his arousal._

_It’s like a tunnel vision. He can only see Hyukjae’s face and he can only feel Hyukjae’s skin under his hands. He needs this, he needs him._

_He hears the gasps and moans and tries to find the sweet spot inside Hyukjae every time he moves his two fingers in and out._

________________________________________________________

Yesung feels his cheeks heat up at the images inside his head.

He remembers behaving strangely calm after starting to touch Hyukjae, after the allowance to do so. Maybe because he felt the younger ones nervousness and as a good hyung he instantly compensated it by acting collected on the outside, as if he knew what he was doing.

Though, his heart hadn’t stopped racing for one second and the storm of affection, arousal and want in his stomach had actually been far away from giving him the feeling of being in control of anything.

Hyukjae’s broken moan as he spilled himself over Yesung’s hand repeats itself over and over again in Yesung’s head, and he abruptly opens his eyes to quiet down the noises in his mind.

Yesung cannot help the guilt starting to gather up and travelling through his whole body. Hyukjae had been so out of it, he had given himself to Yesung completely, even though they bickered in between, Hyukjae had let Yesung touch him the way he wanted to and even told him where to get the lube although Hyukjae didn’t know what Yesung was planning on doing with it.

Actually, Yesung wasn’t so sure himself what he was planning on doing. He had only wanted to feel more of Hyukjae, to make him squirm, to make him arche his back and to make him lose himself in pleasure.

⊱ ⊶ ⊹ ⊷ ⊰

_When Yesung had wrapped the covers around Hyukjae and told him to sleep, his first aim was exactly this. They should sleep, and in the morning, when the night wouldn’t transform the atmosphere into this surreal, loaded and tingling tension they would talk about this and Yesung would explain himself._

_However, after Hyukjae fell into deep slumber and Yesung himself drifted off for a bit, he suddenly awakes from an aching need between his legs. He remembers the slightly erotic dream he had about Hyukjae, while the younger one was sleeping peacefully beside him._

_Yesung_ _feels guilt wash over him and he quietly peels the blanket away from his body to stand up and leave the room._

_He goes to the bathroom and takes a cold shower to calm down his arousal, then he makes himself some tea in the kitchen, sits down at the table and stares into nothingness. The clock showed 4 a.m. and he knows he has at least two hours left, until any of his members will appear from their bedrooms._

_So he decides to sit on the couch instead and read one of his books to hopefully distract himself from his thoughts until he’ll go back to Hyukjae’s room, lie down beside him and wait until the younger one wakes up._

_Yesung_ _opens his eyes as Leeteuk is carefully shaking his shoulder._

_“Hey, Yesung-ah, why are you sleeping on the couch? Come on, get up, I’ll make some coffee.”._

_When Yesung is fully awake and strolls into the kitchen, Siwon, Shindong and Leeteuk are already seated around the table and suddenly Yesung realizes that it would be absolutely weird, if he would now disappear into Hyukjae’s room again._

_He struggles with himself what to do, when Siwon tells him to be the first to take a shower, with the intention of being polite. Yesung successfully dodges the offer. Though, soon he notices that nothing will give him the opportunity to return to Hyukjae’s room, as Kyuhyun and Donghae come sauntering into the kitchen as well. He has actually overslept._

⊱ ⊶ ⊹ ⊷ ⊰

Yesung sighs heavily. And to top it all off, he ran into Hyukjae in the hallway, suddenly feeling completely unprepared and not knowing what to say at all.

The expression on the face of his dongsaeng had been full of embarrassment, insecurity and confusion, and Yesung still wonders what he should have said to make the younger one listen to his words right away and to wipe away these emotions on his face.

_He probably feels ashamed._

_Oh god, what if he is disgusted and he just let me do these things in the so-called heat of the moment?_

_Maybe he just wants to forget the whole thing and pretend it never happened._

Yesung groans and massages his temples with his fingers.

This morning is a mess.


	3. An Undead Vampire Prince

Hyukjae is thankful for the distraction the conversation with Donghae provides. He didn’t even have time to think about the encounter in the hallway and he is actually very glad about that, because he might die out of embarrassment above his own stammering behaviour he showed there.

They have been on their way for about three hours and should arrive at their destination soon. Hyukjae is looking past Donghae out of the window and spots the large building the van is heading towards to. They would shoot greenscreen pictures and video snippets for their upcoming Teaser in a studio a little outside of Seoul today and he was looking forward to getting more insights in the concept, after all he was interested in directing these things himself besides choreographies and stage performances. 

Hyukjae spends the last few minutes in the van thinking up a strategy to handle the situation with Yesung and because the drive has actually made it possible for him to calm down, and he doesn’t feel as agitated as earlier at the moment, he concludes to let this topic slide for now.

He decides to avoid his hyung as far as possible for the time they work, firstly to be able to concentrate on the tasks at hand and secondly because he really doesn’t feel the desire for a confrontation. He knows it might be inevitable and Yesung might try to reach out to him again, to address the elephant in the room like he tried to this morning. Well, at least Hyukjae thinks that Yesung wanted to talk about this in the hallway. And Hyukjae wants him to, he has so many questions, especially why Yesung hasn’t been there in the morning even though he said he would be. It might not be the thing he should be most upset about, but it is. Though, he doesn’t want to ponder about all these questions running around in his head here and now, since he fears them to take over his ability to function properly at work.

_You know, being professional and all…_

However, he really wants Yesung to explain himself and he wants his hyung to take the first step, after all, he started the whole thing, and Hyukjae is absolutely in the right to let Yesung seek the dialogue first. Additionally, it might be surprising, but Hyukjae is not the confrontational type. It has something to do with him feeling not so comfortable in very emotional situations with people he is close to, at least situations as the one he is in right now.

_Though, have I ever been in a situation like this?_

_Rather not._

And it’s actually not as if he feels uncomfortable with every close friend in every emotional situation, it’s rather that with Yesung…

_Aaaargh, stop this nonsense thinking, it’s leading nowhere anyway._

Hyukjae scrunches up his nose and snorts shortly and annoyed.

_Just be normal and don’t get yourself in positions where you have to talk to him, and please, avoid being alone with him._

⋯⋯ ※ ⋯⋯

Not long after the van stops. Hyukjae hurries to jump right out of it with Siwon and Shindong. He engages in their conversation right away and they head off first towards the entrance of the studio.

Donghae, being a little bit surprised at the rushed departure of Hyukjae saunters behind with Leeuteuk and Kyuhyun. Ryeowook and Yesung leaving the van as the last ones, the latter with a unreadable expression on his face.

As soon as they enter the building, the staff leads them to their dressing and make-up rooms, and quick they are all swallowed from head to toe by the busy preparations for the shooting.

Hyukjae never realized how often, his way crosses Yesung’s on such a shooting day, but today it feels as if his hyung is everywhere. Literally, everywhere. At least, Hyukjae seems to spot him anywhere.

He sees Yesung being seated in his chair getting his hair done, notices him scrolling through his phone while he waits for his hair to be blow-dried into the intended hairstyle. He watches him chatting with Ryeowook about a movie, catches a glance of Yesung snacking some crackers in-between and observes his hyung, sitting eyes-closed, and getting his make-up done.

Hyukjae feels himself getting uneasy again. His stress level is definitely rising and instead of letting the topic slide, his mind has decided to flood his thoughts with images of last night every time Hyukjae shuts his eyes to block his view on Yesung.

⋯⋯ ※ ⋯⋯

The stylist has just finished Hyukjae’s make-up and he is currently stiffly resting in his chair. Yesung and Siwon have left first for the dressing room and Hyukjae listens to Donghae and Leeteuk talking nearby, but he doesn’t really register any of the words they say. Something angry and upset bubbles up inside him and he registers himself turning truly mad at Yesung. This might be childish, but he is really not at fault here and why the hell has his hyung not tried to speak to him again?

Hyukjae ignores the nagging at the back of his head that he might have evaded every eye contact Yesung had attempted to establish, because instantly tension had risen up inside him and he had quickly looked away or had even left the room if it was possible.

Hyukjae opens his eyes to a voice talking next to him, no, talking directly to him.

“Oh dear… Hyuk, look at Siwon, this is the best, what kind of sweater is this even?”, Donghae gasps, suddenly right beside him.

Whilst Hyukjae is about to turn his head, Ryeowook, Leeteuk and Shindong are starting to laugh heartily in the farther back of the room.

Hyukjae spots the reason for it right away. Siwon is wearing a sweater which can only be described as an “old-persons-pullover” and he looks, enhanced through the neat hairstyle, even more mature in it than he usually does anyway. What furthermore will probably lead to him looking like their damn dad on the photos later on. Hyukjae can’t help himself and he splutters with laughter.

“Yayayaya! Keep yourself together, you haven’t seen Yesung hyung yet!”, Siwon tries to moderate their laughter, but he can’t keep himself from grinning, knowing very well that he might be looking like a grandpa, but Yesung…

At this moment, said person enters the room and for a second there is total silence filling the space. Though not long and Ryeowook’s shrill but adorable laughter is filling the air even louder than before and now Kyuhyun and Siwon join the laughter of Shindong, Leeteuk and Donghae.

“Hyung, haha, you look like.. some ancient vampire prince!”, Kyuhyun jokes and as Yesung, face completely serious, makes two steps in the direction of Kyuhyun and Ryeowook, the latter starts to screech.

“Please, cursed prince, don’t bite me with these sharp teeth of yours!” and as Yesung squeezes his eyes together in a somewhat threating gaze, Kyuhyun leans slightly downwards Ryeowook and speaks more quietly, “Careful, I heard the eyes of the undead can kill too.”. Ryeowook pushes Kyuhyun in mock anger and they instantly fall into a heated banter which Shindong and Siwon try to hush.

Meanwhile, Leeteuk stepped up to Yesung and is now inspecting the clothing more precisely.

“Are these quillings? And volantes too? What a hell of a mixture… you look antique. Kind of dusty too.”.

“Yah! Hyung…”, Yesung snaps at him appalled, but gets interrupted by a giggling and fascinated Donghae.

“Are we getting a grandma and a vampire princess as well? Hyuk, imagine him beside Siwon, how is this supposed to go together?”.

Hyukjae hasn’t said anything the whole time. He just stares at Yesung, who looks absolutely ridiculous in his outfit. However, all that has space in Hyukjae’s head is that his hyung ate crackers, scrolled through his phone, chatted with Wooki, is now fooling around with the others and STILL HASN’T TRIED TO TALK TO HIM.

Yesung’s gaze is meeting his eyes and Hyukjae can simultaneously feel the eyes of Donghae resting on him, awaiting a reaction.

Though, Hyukjae is in no mood for making fun with Yesung as if nothing happened. And he can feel the still present anger and helplessness bubble up inside him again.

“He’s worn worse.”, is all that leaves his mouth before he turns back around in his seat, pulls out his phone and stares blankly at the screen.

Donghae’s eyebrows rise on his forehead and Leeteuk’s face is immediately covered by a puzzled frown. Whereas Yesung is holding a worried and guilty expression and is watching Hyukjae’s face a moment longer in the mirror, whose existence the younger one has obviously forgotten about.

The rest of the group hasn’t noticed the sudden shift in atmosphere. Kyuhyun positions himself beside Leeteuk and Yesung and calls out for Hyukjae.

“Hey! Eunhyuk-ah, we’re next, come on! Let’s see what they have prepared for us.”, he more like mumbles the last part to himself, slightly in horror.

Hyukjae jolts from his chair and without glancing at Donghae, Leeteuk or Yesung he rushes out of the room, a taken by surprise Kyuhyun following him right after.

⋯⋯ ※ ⋯⋯

Normally, Hyukjae is very good in enveloping a role and he also has years of training in acting professional, therefore Donghae was almost sure that no one but him noticed how Hyukjae’s smile was just a little too forced and how his muscles around his mouth were slightly too tight to be natural today. However, he wasn’t really sure until now that something was wrong.

Therefore, when Hyukjae and Kyuhyun left the room, he looks questioningly at Leeteuk and Yesung, though, the latter avoiding his gaze shuffles over to his own chair and places his body onto it while an almost silent sigh escapes his lips.

Leeteuk watches Yesung’s back for a second, then he soundlessly begs Donghae to step outside the room with him.

Only as the two exited the building and are now strolling over the forecourt of the area, Leeteuk speaks up.

“So, Donghae-ya, tell me what is going on.”, there is no question mark in Leeteuk’s sentence and Donghae looks at him in mild surprise.

“What do you mean Teukkie-hyung? I don’t know what is going on.”.

“Oh, come on, you noticed just like me this morning that Hyukjae was a little off. I didn’t think too much of it because he started acting normal soon enough at the breakfast table, but this reaction right now… there’s clearly something going on.”.

Donghae monitored his shoes as he puts one foot in front of the other and nods his head. Then he looks up at his leader again.

“I still don’t know what’s up with him, but yes, I observed the same things as you did. Actually, he was already a little out of it when I woke him up. However, at breakfast and in the car he seemed fairly normal. Though, I noticed him being kind of tense the whole time since we got here, but I wasn’t so sure about it and I didn’t want to address it if he is just having a bad day.”.

“But he isn’t having just a bad day, is he?”, Leeteuk digs deeper.

“I-…”, Donghae starts reluctantly, he has his eyebrows drawn together and his eyes are glued onto his shoes again.

“I think it has something to do with Yesung hyung.”, he finally tells, and Leeteuk somehow suspects that his dongsaeng is not only basing this statement on the brief encounter between these two from before.

The leader watches Donghae for a moment. “Will you talk to Hyukee? I really didn’t like the expression his dry statement left on Yesungie’s face. I know they bicker all the time and none of us really sees through the layers of their friendship, but we all know it is a meaningful friendship to both of them. Therefore I want this thing, whatever it is between them, to be straightened out as quick as possible.”.

Donghae nods again and Leeteuk stops walking.

“Come on, let’s go back inside before they report us as missing.”, the leader speaks in a less earnest voice.

⋯⋯ ※ ⋯⋯

Hyukjae inspects himself in the mirror and glances over at Kyuhyun. He might be wrong, but he thinks the two of them aren’t dressed as tasteless as Siwon and Yesung. He actually may be starting to realize where this concept is heading and he can imagine the thoughts behind it a tiny bit better by now.

Kyuhyun is still picking at little things of his clothing, but he seems less horrified as before. And Hyukjae has to admit, even though Yesung looks like a undead vampire prince in his clothes… he can totally pull that look off.

_Yesung…_

Hyukjae thinks bitter. He knows his reaction from earlier was highly exaggerated, not only did he feel a sting at Yesung’s troubled expression he registered shortly before turning around, no, he managed to give Donghae AND Leeteuk almost something like a proof that he was not okay, and even worse that it had something to do with Yesung. Hyukjae knows their leader well enough to be aware of Leeteuk not letting something like this just slide. And he is honestly already worried what he is supposed to bring up as an explanation, if the older one decides to confront him about it.

“Eunhyuk-ah, you ready?”, Kyuhyun interrupts his thoughts.

“Yeah, lets get back to the others.”, Hyukjae answers with a tiny smile.

They have just left the dressing room when they bump into Leeteuk and Donghae in the hallway, who are apparently coming from the direction of the entrance to the building.

“Hey, what’re you guys doing?”, Kyuhyun addresses them.

“We were just out for a little walk.”, Leeteuk answers with a smile and he quickly glances at Hyukjae. Then he lightly shoves his elbow into Donghae’s side and gives him a meaningful look. Donghae seems a little bit confused at first, but when Leeteuk suddenly grabs Kyuhyun, entangles their arms and saunters off while asking the maknae absolutely ridiculous questions the young one can only splutter irritably at, Hyukjae knows what that elbow shove meant.

He watches his best friend, who obviously isn’t feeling that comfortable in his own skin at the moment.

“Hyukee… are you okay?”, Donghae asks hesitantly, but also straightforward.

Hyukjae can’t help the short snort of laughter escaping his lips. This is so typical of Donghae, seeming not totally comfortable with the situation, but spitting out the most rash sentence anyway.

“You already know the answer, don’t you? And I suppose Leeteuk knows as well.”, he therefore only responds and Donghae appears slightly surprised at the direct reply.

“Yeah.. I know and yes, Teukkie hyung knows too. To be fair, your encounter with Yesung earlier would have made anyone suspicious.”, Donghae admits, smiles apologetically and shrugs.

Hyukjae sighs and drops his head a little. “Yeah.. I guess that’s right.”.

“Soo.. what’s the matter? It has something to do with Yesung hyung, correct?”.

“No kidding.”, Hyukjae grins grimly.

“Does it have something to do with the thing we agreed on never talking about again? Or rather, the thing you never wanted to talk about ever again?”, Donghae speaks a whole notch quieter now and Hyukjae just blinks at him for a few seconds.

“W-what?”, he stammers out perplexed.

“You know,”, Donghae starts right away to help Hyukjae’s memory, “the night we drank soju and even some liquor, and I asked you about this teasing thing you do with Yesu-“.

Donghae isn’t able to continue, because Hyukjae has literally jumped him and is now pressing one of his hands tightly over his best friends mouth, his own eyes wide in horror and embarrassment staring at Donghae’s face.

“Hae!”, he rasps. “Of course I remember! And we had an agreement to never mention this conversation. So for god’s sake, shut up!”.

“I’m sorry! I’ll stop talking about it, I promise!”, Donghae tries to mumble through Hyukjae’s hand on his mouth and Hyukjae calms himself down enough to let go of his best friend.

They just breathe heavily for a few seconds, then Donghae speaks up one more time.

“So… I guess it is useless now to ask you again what happened between you two, because you won’t tell me anyway?”, he says timidly.

“You are damn right.”, Hyukjae replies with no heat in his voice.

“Fine,” Donghae sighs, “but be aware that Leeteuk himself will take action if I don’t report him a satisfactory and defusing answer for your previous behaviour.”.

Hyukjae is just about to stare alarmed at his friend as the door of their make-up and lounge room opens and Shindong walks out, spotting the two friends down the hallway right away and shouting for Donghae.

“There you are! We’re next honey pie, let’s get us something fancy to dress!”, Shindong laughs heartily while marching towards Hyukjae and Donghae.

Donghae just throws Hyukjae an apologetic look again, then he grins brightly at Shindong and they saunter off to the dressing room, disappearing behind the door seconds later.

Hyukjae remains dumbfounded at his spot for the next few moments, then he shakes his head and starts wandering to the door of their make-up and lounge room. He ponders about the things Donghae mentioned and he slowly begins to regret that he didn’t tell his friend that the thing between Yesung and him is something only they can solve and that they will do so as soon as possible. And that Donghae should report to Leeteuk that nothing bad is going on and that the problem is almost already settled. Of course, it would have been a lie, but Hyukjae kind of fears the meddling of his leader in this whole thing.

⋯⋯ ※ ⋯⋯

The rest of the day is rather productive and except for the silent tension between Yesung and Hyukjae, and Donghae ripping his shirt open at the shoulder parts, nothing out of the ordinary happens.

They get to the dorm relatively late, because of the long ride back and their stopover at a restaurant to eat something for dinner. As soon as they enter their momentary home almost everyone prepares for going to bed, only Shindong and Siwon sit down in the living room to quietly continue the conversation they started in the van.

Since Super Junior isn’t having as much members as the group used to have and as much as Leeteuk is sad about this fact, one positive aspect is there about it: they all have their own room in the dorm now, without needing to share the space with a member. Leeteuk possibly wouldn’t have suggested moving back in together if they all had to share rooms again. Those times were over, well at least mostly. On tour or vacation they sometimes still stayed in pairs at the rooms.

The leader is currently lying on his bed, basically fully ready to go to sleep, though his thoughts are wandering back to the encounter between Hyukjae and Yesung, and to the strained atmosphere which had lingered between them the whole day.

Donghae had told him that Hyukjae didn’t want to talk. However, Donghae still pleaded for Leeteuk to not interfere, but Leeteuk feels responsible for his members and he is not used to trouble between Yesung and Hyukjae.

He ponders about what to do, because he is convinced that he has to do _something_. At the latest tomorrow, if in the morning the situation hasn’t gotten any better. Independent of this, Leeteuk is somewhat at a loss how his so-called ‘solving-the-problem’ is supposed to look like.

Sighing deeply, he pulls out his phone and selects a speed dial.

“Helloo?”, a slightly grumpy answer is audible after the third beep.

“Heechul-ya, how’re you doing?”, Leeteuk can’t help the instant smile that is spreading over his whole face as he hears the familiar voice.

“Teukkie, it is,” there is shortly light rustling hearable, then Heechul continues, “2 a.m.! What the hell do you want and don’t give me an ‘I just wanted to know how my world’s most favourite person is doing’!”. Heechul imitates Leeteuk’s way of talking in the worst kind of way, all high-pitched and squeaky.

Leeteuk just laughs at him. “I would never ever call you that!”.

“You already did.”, Heechul responds cheekily.

“I don’t remember this happening!”, Leeteuk denies resolutely.

“Pfffh! Alright, I let you off the hook, because it is late and I’m fucking tired but also unbearable curious why you’re calling me so late. So, spit it out, what’s going on?”.

Leeteuk’s laughter subsides, but he still smiles, feeling how comforting Heechul’s presence is, even if it is only over the phone.

“There is something going on between Yesung and Hyukjae.”, he says calmly.

“I guess you don’t mean what it sounds like to me.”, Heechul reacts drily and Leeteuk snorts.

“No. I mean, I actually don’t know what is going on, but the ice-cold tension between those two doesn’t seem to be very lovingly, though quite passionate if you want to say so.”.

“Huh.”, Heechul says astonished. “And how can I help you with this Teukkie?”.

Leeteuk’s stomach fills itself with warmth.

“I thought you might be able to give me a suggestion on what to do to help them solve their problem, whatever argument it is they’re having.”.

“Ohh, I would just go with the classical parenting approach!”, Heechul advises right away.

“And that is…?”, Leeteuk inquires.

“Lock them up together in a room and throw away the key. Well… better keep the key, but only let them out if they are friends again.”, comes the enthusiastic reply.

Leeteuk laughs out loud. “Heechul-ya, this is…”, he sobers up and goes on, “actually not such a bad idea.”.

“I know. Would I have suggested it otherwise?”, Heechul responds smugly.

“Yes, you would have.”, Leeteuk answers drily immediately.

“Yayaya, okay, okay. But hey, you have your advice now!”, the other one retorts.

“Yes, that’s true, thank you very much and good night, my world’s most favourite person.”, Leeteuk grins and breathes the last part of the sentence cheesily into the phone.

He can hear a whispered “I knew it! Sleep well, hyung.”, just before he hangs up.


	4. Secret Talks and Crafty Hyungs

**18 months ago **

_“HA! You lost!”, Donghae’s smile is wide and gloating._

_“No… This can’t be. No. I refuse!”, Hyukjae slams his flat hand onto the table in outrage._

_“No way! You proposed the extended rules! You cannot refuse!”, Donghae objects, his hands on his hips._

_“Exactly. I changed the rules, so I can change them again. And I refuse!”, Hyukjae argues back._

_“You’re unbelievable!”, Donghae’s eyes are wide in disbelief and laughter is flickering in his pupils._

_“I know.”, Hyukjae smirks smugly and Donghae shakes his head, truly laughing by now._

_“I don’t care that you made the rules or that you regret making them, or that you lost the last three rounds and are therefore three shots ahead of me. You’re gonna down that fourth one as well or I will make you!, Donghae threatens him and Hyukjae frowns._

_Then he switches tactics._

_“I caaan’t, please, don’t make me! I’m so drunk already, I cannot even see straight anymore!”, Hyukjae whines in an irritating tone._

_“Nah-uh, I already told you, there is no way for you to get out of this. I know exactly that you originally intended to get me drunk into oblivion so you could paint something absolutely dumb and not the least bit funny on my face and take a picture.”, Donghae accuses Hyukjae and sticks to his point._

_“Yesung hyung would scold you anyway for something so childish.”, he adds and Hyukjae snorts._

_“Yesung hyung.. he would. But he would also paint every inch of skin with a black waterproof marker if it would be my face instead of yours.”, Hyukjae states in a huff._

_Donghae chuckles delighted, “No, he wouldn’t!”._

_Hyukjae just snorts again, then he reaches for the half-full bottle on the table and pours some of the liquor into his shot glass. He looks at it disgusted, squeezes his eyes shut and chugs all of the burning liquid down his throat in one go._

_When he sets the glass down, he coughs once and Donghae pats him on the shoulder with satisfaction. “There you go.”._

_Hyukjae squints through glassy eyes annoyed at his best friend._

_“Let’s play again.”, he then announces, his jaw set in determination and Donghae can only look at him speechless for a second. Soon after though, he shrugs. He is four shots behind, he knows who is going to be completely wasted first, and it is not going to be him._

_Another three rounds later, Hyukjae is more lying then sitting on the couch he and Donghae spent the past two hours on. They met up at Donghae’s home and are currently staying in the latter’s living room. Hyukjae’s head is resting against the back of the couch and he has his eyes closed. He has only lost one of these last rounds, but it isn’t helping him at all, because the entity of five shots and the amount of beer they drank beforehand, are absolutely enough to get him beyond the state of being pleasantly buzzed._

_“I have to admit something.”, he starts talking to Donghae, who slumped further into the cushions beside him._

_“And that is?”, the younger one enquires._

_“I admit that the idea of replacing four sips of beer with a shot of liquor as punishment for losing a round was absolutely stupid.”._

_Donghae giggles. “But it was also kind of fun though.”._

_“It was, wasn’t it?”, Hyukjae chuckles himself._

_They fall into peaceful and slightly tired silence._

_“We should play it with the others some time.”, Donghae eventually speaks up again._

_“No way,”, Hyukjae splutters with laughter, “I’m not allowed to get this drunk in front of Yesung hyung, like, ever.”._

_Donghae furrows his brows, “Why’s that?”._

_“Because I might say or do something really stupid.”, Hyukjae groans and laughs once right after._

_Donghae, not fully understanding what his friend is talking about, asks, ”More stupid than these extended rules of yours?”._

_Hyukjae nods vehemently and causes his head to bump a few times against the backrest of the couch._

_“You mean your teasing would go completely out of hand?”, Donghae digs deeper, fairly amused._

_“Actually, I would love to hear what you’d say to him in a drunken state.”, Donghae smiles tipsy into nothingness._

_“Oh, believe me, he would throw the worst fit you’d have ever seen from him.”, Hyukjae whispers soundless and with a stern voice._

_Donghae turns his head to observe his friend, feeling irritated by the formulation of the last phrase and the way Hyukjae’s tone changed._

_“What are you talking about Hyuk?”, he requests._

_“I-…”, Hyukjae starts, but stops again right away. “Nothing.”, he concludes and to Donghae’s shock the other’s lower lip is slightly trembling._

_Donghae sits himself upright, turns his body fully towards Hyukjae and rests one hand on his friends knee._

_“What is going on all of a sudden?”._

_The sigh Hyukjae lets out is heavy and long. Then he opens his eyes slightly to look at Donghae._

_“Hae... I think I have a real fucking problem.”._

_It is nothing usual for Hyukjae to share his inner troubles, he mostly keeps these things to himself. Still, Donghae knows him very well and he is always there if Hyukjae wants to talk nonetheless._

_“I’m really not able to follow your trait of thoughts at the moment, but if you want to get it out, I will listen.”, Donghae answers, watching Hyukjae attentively._

_“Aaahh, this is so uncomfortable and dumb as well.”, Hyukjae clasps his hands over his face and groans again. But then he pulls himself together, sits a little straighter on the sofa and takes one deep breath before he starts talking._

_“I first want you to know that I would never ever mention this if I wasn’t dead drunk right now. Second, I want us to never ever talk about this again after this conversation. You have to promise.”, Hyukjae lifts his head to see if Donghae is keeping up. The latter one nods at Hyukjae’s orders._

_“Alright, promise.”._

_“Okay. So, you know how you and I are really good friends and all?”, Hyukjae begins._

_“Yeah.. I guess I noticed that somewhere along the way.”, Donghae jokes, but closes his mouth quickly as he sees Hyukjae’s undelighted gaze. “Sorry, please keep going.”._

_“I think I have like two best friends. That’s clearly you and it is Yesung hyung.”, Hyukjae is rubbing the palms of his hands over his jeans while talking, a nervous gesture Donghae registers out of the corner of his eye. He doesn’t urge Hyukjae on and just waits for his friend to continue._

_“And you know how I’m always teasing Yesung and that we’re bickering a lot. And,”, Hyukjae is sighing once again. “Let me start over. You and I, our friendship is very important to me and it runs deep, yet, the friendship with Yesung is kinda - …”, Hyukjae stops his explanations again. “I really_ really _don’t know in the slightest how to say this.”._

_Donghae still doesn’t react for a moment, he wonders how to approach this the right way, because even if it is surprising to him and even though he truly didn’t expect this, he still has a feeling for the direction things are heading in that Hyukjae is talking about._

_“So, what exactly is this constant teasing about, for real?”, Donghae decides to ask and Hyukjae throws him such a desperate look that Donghae’s chest is clenching._

_“I’m not sure…”, is Hyukjae’s reply and Donghae just examines his face for a second._

_“What’s the difference of the friendship between us and the friendship between you and him?”, Donghae continues to ask further._

_“I don’t know…”, Hyukjae recognizes the slightly strict look in Donghae’s eyes and he knows his answers aren’t good enough._

_“Fine.”, Hyukjae nods. “I think I depend on this bickering between him and myself to not show openly to everyone that I feel myself drawn to him in a… not so platonic kind of way. There, I said it.”._

_“Are you telling me right now that you’re having a crush on Yesung hyung since our trainee days??”, Donghae’s mouth remains open in shock and Hyukjae jolts slightly in his seat._

_“No! And it’s not a crush! I think I developed these… stirrings only lately.”._

_“But you said the bickering is helping you to cope with ‘these stirrings’ of yours and you tease Yesung hyung since the time you two met.”._

_“I know,”, Hyukjae sighs exasperated. “The teasing and bickering is just how our friendship works, I guess. Yet, my feelings for him only changed lately and now I feel like I truly need the banter to keep my sanity in front of him and everybody else.”._

_“Aha, now you have not only some ‘stirrings’ but already ‘feelings’ for him. Sure it’s not a crush?”, Donghae smiles cheekily and Hyukjae stares at him disbelievingly._

_“Are you serious? Are you trying to trick me into telling you… what exactly?”._

_“Well.. in my defence, you didn’t make a lot of sense in the beginning and at least now I know what’s going on.”, Donghae defends himself._

_“This is unbelievable-“, Hyukjae covers his forehead with one of his hands._

_“Listen Hyukee, I thought keeping it light would make you feel more comfortable talking about this. But we can also leave that be. So, you like Yesung hyung.”, Donghae’s voice got calmer and his facial expression is less perky._

_Hyukjae glances at his friend. If Donghae’s face is like this, he looks so mature and sharp, not like the slightly quirky and still playful man he is._

_“I don’t like_ like _him.”, he defends himself right away._

_Donghae ignores him. “Are you going to tell him?”._

_“What?? No. Of course not!”, Hyukjae can feel his ears start to heat up and a dull feeling is spreading in his stomach just at the thought of telling Yesung._

_“So what are you going to do then?”, Donghae persists._

_“Uhm… nothing?”, Hyukjae shifts his body on the couch._

_“Nothing?”, Donghae asks incredulous._

_“Nothing.”, Hyukjae responds with a more secure voice._

_“But…”, the other tries to argue, though Hyukjae notices how he has enough of this conversation now. The sinking feeling of regret crystalizes itself inside him and he is suddenly certain that it wasn’t a good idea to admit it out loud, the thoughts and feelings which were haunting him for some time now._

_Also, the unhealthy amount of alcohol makes it even more difficult for him to deal with this situation and he experiences the sudden urge to just crawl into his bed, sleep off the booze and hopefully forget everything over night until he wakes up the next day._

_“Hae, let us stop talking about this for now okay? I actually don’t feel too good and would love to just go to bed.”, he therefore addresses his friend._

_Donghae gives him a quick and serious look, then he laughs lightly. “Too much liquor?”._

_“Definitely too much liquor.”, Hyukjae laughs as well and he is incredibly glad about Donghae instantly accepting his request and letting the topic slide._

_“Well then, give me your hand, I’ll help you up.”. Hyukjae clasps Donghae’s hand with his own and gets pulled to his feet, a little too fast for his unsteady state. But Donghae slings one of his arms around Hyukjae’s middle right away and Hyukjae wraps his arm around Donghae’s shoulder to stay upright. This extent of support isn’t really necessary, but Hyukjae doesn’t complain._

_“Before I go,”, Hyukjae speaks up as Donghae makes his first step towards the door, “remember what you promised me?”._

_“To never talk about this again, yeah, I got that. But if you ever want to…”, Donghae turns his head and meets Hyukjae’s eyes._

_“Yeahh, I know, thank you.”, Hyukjae replies and smiles gently._

* * *

**Today **

It’s not that late when Hyukjae enters the kitchen area to make himself his morning drink and he greets Leeteuk, who is sitting there at the breakfast table.

“Morning hyung, is everybody else still asleep?”, he asks and can’t help the little nervous jump his stomach does as he remembers Donghae’s warning from the day before, about their leader threatening with intervention if Hyukjae and Yesung won’t make up.

“Good morning Hyukjae-ah.”, Leeteuk smiles. “Kyuhyun and Shindong should be, yes. Siwon headed out for the gym and Ryeowook left early to visit his family. And actually, I have no idea where Donghae is…”, he concludes with a puzzled expression.

While he let his tea brew behind him on the kitchen counter, Hyukjae has turned around to face Leeteuk at his explanations. Now he watches his hyung indecisively.

_Did he forget to mention Yesung on purpose?_

Hyukjae knows his reaction is taking him too long and it is already to late to save it. He has just stared at Leeteuk while pondering if he should casually ask for the whereabouts of his other hyung or if Leeteuk is trying to set up a trap.

“Something wrong Hyukjae-ah?”, Leeteuk asks, still smiling and Hyukjae feels caught.

“Uhh, no, just, you forgot to mention Yesung hyung.”, he states.

“Ahh, you’re right!”, Leeteuk admits right away. “He’s taking a shower at the moment as far as I know.”.

Hyukjae nods and before he can think about anything else to say, Leeteuk’s phone vibrates once on the table in front of him. The leader glances down quickly and gets up from his chair right after.

“Everything okay?”, Hyukjae asks surprised.

“Yeah,” Leeteuk smiles brightly. “Heechul-ya is here, I’ll go and open up for him.”, and he leaves through the kitchen door, hurrying to the entrance.

Hyukjae stays behind and is just about to start wondering what Heechul is doing here in the middle of the week, as a cosily clothed Yesung is walking into the room, with slightly damp hair and wet tips. His eyes glued to his phone.

Hyukjae’s palms around his cup are getting sweaty and he frantically thinks of something to address Yesung with, so that the older one notices him being in the kitchen as well.

“Watch your steps hyung, someday your gonna fall onto your face walking like this.”, and Hyukjae really really didn’t mean that to come out so bitchy and squeaky at the same time.

Yesung lifts his head startled and when he registers Hyukjae standing in front of him, he nods shortly, but doesn’t hold the eye contact.

“Ah Hyukjae-ah, good morning to you too, I guess.”, he says casually and turns towards the sink to get himself a glass of water.

Hyukjae just stares, he hasn’t moved from his spot at all and his eyes are fixating Yesung’s profile.

_What the hell?_

At this moment Leeteuk and Heechul are audible in the hallway, their steps nearing the kitchen and seconds after, they both appear in the doorway.

“Well, I guess we don’t have much more to do.”, Heechul states and Hyukjae shifts his gaze to look at him.

Yesung turns around, surprised at the voice of his friend. “Heechul-ya! What are you doing here in the morning?”, he asks.

“Oh, you know Yesungie, just supporting our leader here a bit.”, Heechul’s smile is blinding and absolutely not trustworthy. Though, before Hyukjae or Yesung can sense what is up with the slightly suspicious atmosphere, Heechul leans his body further into the room, sneaks his hand around the inner side of the door and grabs the key.

“Have a nice chat you two.”, he adds and with that he closes the kitchen door and the two, who are left alone in the room can hear the key turning in the lock.

“What the fuck?”, Yesung blurts out, absolutely astonished.

Meanwhile, Hyukjae is too busy to not go into overdrive in his head, to react to the mean trap of his hyungs.

“Hyukjae, do you know what is going on?”, Yesung looks at him expectantly and Hyukjae can only gape. Is this hyung playing dumb?

He feels himself getting upset.

_How can he just act as if everything is completely normal?_

“I think you know very well what is going on.”, he grits out between his teeth and Yesung’s eyes widen at the displayed anger on Hyukjae’s face.

“I-…”, the older one begins, but leaves the sentence unfinished.

“They noticed something is wrong between us and because I didn’t want to tell Donghae or Leeteuk _what_ exactly is wrong, our leader obviously decided to take action himself.”, Hyukjae explains and his voice is strained and impatient.

Yesung swallows heavily and Hyukjae can’t help the slight feeling of satisfaction that is flooding him as he registers Yesung beginning to be uncomfortable.

“You’re mad.”, is Yesung’s reply and Hyukjae is shortly caught of guard by the statement.

“Yes.”, he simply answers.

Yesung sighs, his eyes drifting to the glass of water in his hands and it seems as if he is trying to gather is thoughts. Hyukjae’s stubbornness is subsiding with every passing second he waits for his hyung to say something and he starts shifting his body weight from one foot to the other.

“I’m sorry,”, Yesung's eyes are searching for Hyukjae's and he holds the gaze when he finds them. Hyukjae tries to gulp around the lump in his throat, but his voice is still hoarse when he speaks.

“For what?”.

Yesung takes another second to answer and Hyukjae could explode from the tension.

“I didn’t think you wanted to talk about it. After you avoided all of my glances yesterday, I just assumed that you don’t want to.”.

Hyukjae breaks the eye contact for a moment and is now looking at his cup between his hands, as Yesung did a minute earlier with his glass of water.

“I just needed some time to... deal, I guess.”, he lifts his gaze again and meets Yesung’s, who is still watching him. “But I wanted you to talk to me, and I wanted you to talk to me first, because you-, I mean…”, Hyukjae doesn’t know how to continue, but Yesung steps in.

“Because I started it?”.

Hyukjae nods and he feels heat traveling to his cheeks. He lets go of the cup with one hand and rubs it quickly over his jeans, before clasping at the porcelain again as if it could ground him somehow.

“Listen, Hyukjae-ah,”, Yesung puts his glass down on the counter and takes a few steps in Hyukjae’s direction until he is only half a meter away, and Hyukjae feels himself slightly backing away nervously. Though, he registers the counter’s edge almost directly behind his back and he can’t help the light panic rising in his chest.

Yesung, noticing Hyukjae’s shifting, halts in his tracks and his dark eyes examine his dongsaeng’s face attentively.

Hyukjae feels himself turning more and more fidgety at the unreadable gaze, and the silence between them makes him wonder if Yesung is able to hear his heartbeat loudly thrumming in his chest.

Yesung doesn’t try to come nearer and then he sighs, sounding pained.

“I’m so sorry Hyukjae-ah. I shouldn’t have taken advantage of you that night. I know it sounds weak considering the way I touched you, but I really didn’t mean to hurt you.”.

Hyukjae is frozen on the spot. He is unable to respond in any way and his eyes are big and round as they stare at Yesung.

Somehow he had totally forgotten to consider, over all his turmoil and anger, how terrifying and embarrassing it would be to talk about that night with Yesung. He was so mad the whole time that he only now notices how insecure Yesung’s calmness is making him feel.

At the same time, the closeness between them awakens a yearning he always successfully kept buried deep within himself. It seems that this one night destroyed all the composure he so carefully maintained each time Yesung's body was near him, and he is starting to realize that this situation right here is totally out of his control.

_Just like the night itself._

Hyukjae's biggest problem right now is the torturing urge to touch Yesung. To reach for his hands, to hug him. To bury his face in the fabric of the soft-looking hoodie Yesung is wearing, and to smell the freshly washed hair. In response to the realization of his longing, Hyukjae pushes himself even closer to the furniture behind him.

Yesung’s eyes in front of him fill themselves with guilt.

“Hyukjae-ah-“, though, he gets interrupted by the younger one.

“Why were you gone in the morning?”, Hyukjae rasps and it’s all that he is able to come up with in this moment.

Yesung looks at him confused. “I couldn’t sleep after.. you know, so I left and then I fell asleep on the couch. When I woke up everyone was already awake.”.

“Oh.”, Hyukjae could hit himself for his timid and blank reaction.

“Please listen to me Hyukjae, I really am sorry for what I did. I don’t know what was wrong with me that night, I was- there is really no apology for it, but I promise you, it won’t happen again. I don’t know how to explain this, but I think I wasn’t in my right mind that night.”.

Hyukjae’s throat closes up at the words and it starts getting hard to breathe. He tries to draw air in through his nose, but it seems in vain. His eyes blink fast and he desperately attempts to control the clenching feeling in his chest.

Yesung, who is still observing his dongsaeng’s face recognizes the uneasiness the latter is experiencing.

“Hyukjae-ah…”, he reaches for Hyukjae's shoulder, but lets his arm drop again before he reaches the younger.

“We can pretend it never happened. I promise I will do everything so you will feel comfortable in my presence again. It was just.. a slip.”, Yesung tries to calm the younger one down, he even forces a small smile onto his lips to reassure his dongsaeng that everything is going to be fine.

But Hyukjae can’t help his sharp intake of air and the shaky exhalation, he thinks he might be tearing up any second now.

_Just a slip huh._

He gathers up all the strength he has left and nods once. “Okay. Lets forget about it.”.

Yesung’s eyes never left his face and Hyukjae can see the doubt in his hyung’s eyes.

“I want us to be okay, Hyukjae-ah, even though I have no right to request it. Can I do something to make things between us okay?”.

“We’re okay. Really, it never happened. I mean, it’s not like that much happened anyway right?”, and Hyukjae laughs short and hollow.

“Are you sure we’re okay?”, Yesung persists and Hyukjae feels that he is not going to hold up in this situation much longer.

“Don’t ask me so often or else I might change my mind.”, Hyukjae responds and tries to grin cheekily.

At this moment they can hear yelling on the other side of the door.

“And what made you think it was a good idea to lock them up in the kitchen of all places??”, they hear Shindong shout.

There is short heated mumbling and murmuring, then the key in the lock turns and the door flies open.

“I’m very sorry guys, but could you continue your important conversation in a different, not so essential room of the dorm?”, Kyuhyun is standing in the doorway, smiling not so apologetically at the two of them.

“Ahh, that’s fine Kyuhyun-ah, we were done here anyway.”, Hyukjae beams, feeling himself closing up completely. He registers Yesung’s eyes on him, turns his head to give his hyung a smiling nod and rushes to leave the kitchen.


	5. Bad Conscience and Nocturnal Visitors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! :)) 
> 
> This chapter is a rather long one again, and I thought about cutting it in half, but it just didn't feel right to me.. So I hope you don't mind <3
> 
> And I know, I already put this story as 'mature', but I still wanted to mention: slight spiciness ahead in this one. :'3

It is almost fully dark outside and even though the lights of the city make it difficult to spot them, a few stars are visible at the sky above.

Yesung is sitting on a bench, alone, though near the dorm. He had left their current home for his personal schedules after the conversation with Hyukjae and until now he hasn’t found the strength to go back inside.

The whole day had kept him very busy and there had been no time for him to review the talk they had this morning. But Yesung has to reflect on the things they said, the things he said. He is a highly disciplined person and it isn’t uncommon that his friends or family tell him to be less strict with himself. However, right now Yesung is experiencing an amount of self-disgust he hasn’t felt in a very long time. Maybe even never felt to this degree.

Not had he only touched Hyukjae in a definite sexual way, no he had also lied into the younger one’s face. About it being not a big deal and that he didn’t mean anything by it.

But Hyukjae had looked so scared. His whole demeanour screaming insecurity, panic and the worst of all, lack of trust.

At first Yesung had thought about honestly admitting to Hyukjae the way he felt these last weeks and how all self-control slipped through his fingers that night. As he saw the anger and betrayal in his dongsaeng’s eyes it urged him to explain everything, to tell Hyukjae that he felt himself being drawn to him, being attracted to him. That he savoured every single second of their night, every touch, every sound, every gasp that had escaped Hyukjae’s lips when Yesung was tracing his skin.

Though, seeing Hyukjae backing away from him and pressing himself against the kitchen counter to bring as much distance between them as possible, had deeply hurt Yesung and made himself realize that this was his fault and his fault alone.

So he did what a good hyung, a good friend should do. A friend who protects and cares. So Yesung lied, to take off the burden of Hyukjae, to put the situation at ease and to hopefully moderate the damage. He worships their friendship and he would do anything to maintain this special bond between them.

_Well, maybe you should have thought about that before invading his personal space and making him come all over your hand._

Yesung groans quietly, tilts his head back and lets his eyes fixate the sky.

_The cruellest thing about this is, I can’t stop thinking about it. About the way he felt under my hands, his smooth skin and his trembling thighs. The aroused panting and the way he twitched in my hand. His moans, how can I ever forget the way he moans.. oh my god. I’m the worst._

He knows that there is absolutely nothing okay between him and Hyukjae. He knows because of the way he can’t let go of the memory and he knows because of the painfully forced smile on his dongsaeng’s face as he left the kitchen.

After combing his hands through his hair once, Yesung decides to walk back to the dorm and he thinks about maybe taking a quick shower before heading to bed soon.

He turns his key in the lock and quietly steps into the hallway of their dorm, he wants to pretend that it is not because he feels kind of uneasy about running into Hyukjae, but exactly that is the case.

He slips out of his shoes and hangs up his coat. He notices that the dorm is silent and he muses his members must have already gone to sleep. Yesung stops at his room to drop off his bag, then he gets ready for bed in the bathroom and afterwards saunters back into his room, to hopefully get at least some hours of regenerating sleep.

* * *

For Hyukjae, the next few days go by in a haze. He is having schedules with Donghae for their next D&E project and a photoshoot for a magazine he is going to appear in. The times he is free, he spends mostly in the practice room or at the gym.

On the side he witnesses his members being rather buried in work as well. It still doesn’t go unnoticed by him that Yesung is the one he sees the least, and he might even have a moment or two where he ponders if he is avoiding meeting his hyung or if his hyung is avoiding to meet him.

However, whenever they run into each other, they are awfully polite and treat the other one very carefully, absolutely not the way they used to act around each other. Hyukjae is not sure why Yesung is doing it, because at their conversation he had signalled his hyung that everything was fine between them. Though, Yesung is a rather sensitive character, so he might sense that Hyukjae is still not feeling completely at ease with their situation.

Hyukjae is sure Leeteuk is also still aware of something being not in the right, but their leader had been very busy himself these days and probably just had no time to deal with the struggles of his two friends as well. Hyukjae is really not complaining about this though.

The more days pass by, the more surreal the whole incident with Yesung appears to Hyukjae. At some point one day he even wondered if he imagined it all, but later that said day he had caught Yesung at the door as he was leaving and his hyung had just returned from an appointment, and when he registered their awkward civil demeanour towards each other, he was certain again that this night was not an imagination of his mind.

Right now Hyukjae is lying in his bed and staring up at the ceiling. It’s been nearly over a week now that he and Yesung had this uncomfortable conversation in the kitchen, and tomorrow is the first day since then that Hyukjae has no schedule or appointments at all. It might seem incomprehensible, but exactly this knowledge is keeping Hyukjae from finding any sleep. He had packed up every minute with activities in the last week, so he couldn’t even to an extent drown in his thoughts about Yesung.

_And now I’m scared of tomorrow because I have absolutely nothing to do._

Normally Hyukjae enjoys the days he has nothing on his plate. He plans them, like, he plans to do nothing and it is the best, because usually he is either very busy or he makes himself busy. It’s rather simple, Hyukjae likes to work, to be occupied, but he also likes to plan being lazy if free days come up.

Tomorrow announced itself to be such a free day he could pass leisurely in the dorm, watching movies, eating, maybe see which members were free as well and spend some time with them.

Yet, Hyukjae feels himself being outright not in the mood to just loaf around the dorm and increasing the chances to get in contact with Yesung. He is aware of it being stupid, he should try to engage more with his hyung in order to normalize their relationship again, but he can’t seem to gather up the strength, at least until now.

Hyukjae sighs annoyed and turns onto his side, now staring into the dark room.

_There is no use to this._

And fed up he sits upright, throws his legs over the edge of the bed and stands up. Clad in boxers and t-shirt, he decides to grab something to drink in the kitchen and slips through the door of his room onto the dark and quiet hallway.

It’s already night time and he is sure everyone is asleep by now, but as he walks towards the kitchen he spots a small light brightening up the room. While he is still approaching, he registers a silhouette at the sink and only as he steps almost into the room he realizes that it is Yesung, who seems to have had the same idea, and is currently filling a glass with water.

Hyukjae stops in the doorway, pondering if he should go in as well or try to sneak back into his room. Though, before he can decide between these two options, Yesung turns around, glass at his lips, and he almost chokes on his water as he registers Hyukjae at the door.

“Goood, Hyukjae-ah, you scared the living shit out of me.”, he mutters while still coughing slightly.

Hyukjae, a little nervous, laughs nevertheless and scratches the back of his head.

“I’m sorry, didn’t mean to.”, he apologizes sheepishly.

Yesung lifts his gaze to look at Hyukjae’s face and the latter’s tenseness increases immediately.

“Are you unable to fall asleep?”, his hyung inquires.

“Yeah…”, Hyukjae simply answers.

“Yeah.. I get that.”, Yesung sighs a little and it appears as if he is more talking to himself.

“Do you want a glass of water too?”, he adds shortly after, addressing his dongsaeng.

“Uhh, yes, that would be great.”, Hyukjae replies, smiling strained.

Yesung grabs a glass from the shelf above, turns around to the sink and fills the second glass with water as well. Then he faces Hyukjae again and extents his arm, the glass of water grasped in his hand.

Hyukjae takes a few hesitant steps towards Yesung, and as he reaches for the glass their hands touch each other on the small available surface.

Hyukjae senses it like a jolt going through his whole body and he notices how his hand starts to tremble all of a sudden. Shaken he looks up and meets Yesung’s dark and analysing, but warm eyes.

Yesung holds Hyukjae’s gaze for a few seconds, and Hyukjae feels as if the dark orbs are piercing through his skin into his soul, baring everything he tries to hide so desperately.

He reflexively pulls back his hand.

“I-…”, he stammers, but he honestly doesn’t know what to say.

_Jesus fucking Christ, he just touched your hand. Your hand!_

Yesung isn’t responding. Instead he makes three strides towards Hyukjae until he is standing right in front of his dongsaeng, two glasses of water still in his hands.

“Hyukjae-ah,”, his eyes scan the younger’s face and Hyukjae fights the urge to flee.

“I thought we’re okay? Didn’t you say we are? Why am I continuously having the feeling that we are absolutely not?”, Yesung addresses the topic right away.

“We are!”, Hyukjae splutters directly and speaks a little calmer right after, “We are okay.”.

Hyukjae sighs, this whole back and forth doesn’t make any sense.

_Just try to get back to being normal with each other. Get your shit together already._

“I’m sorry hyung. I really don’t know what’s the matter with me at the moment. I’m not mad at you and we really are okay. I promise.”, Hyukjae focuses his eyes on Yesung’s.

The latter sighs deeply himself. “Alright. I hope you mean it.”, he responds while not breaking the eye contact.

Hyukjae nods his head in determination and as he sees a small smile appear on Yesung’s lips, his heart flutters in his chest and he can’t help but smile weakly as well.

_We’re okay hyung. For you it was a slip, for me more than I ever thought would happen between us, and now we leave it at that, that’s fine._

Yesung nudges one of the glasses against Hyukjae’s torso.

“Are you taking your water now already? My arm is getting heavy.”, he grins mildly.

“Oh, yes, yes of course,”, Hyukjae slightly laughs surprised. “Don’t want you to have sore muscles tomorrow.”, he adds, his usual cheeky grin appearing on his face.

Yesung actually snorts. “Yah, you brat!”.

And Hyukjae suddenly feels so light and redeemed. This is normal, this is familiar and he likes this.

“Come on, let’s go to bed. Even if we have no schedules tomorrow it’s never healthy to disrupt one’s sleeping rhythm.”, Yesung states. “Or do you actually have an appointment tomorrow?”.

“Aish, you sound like such an old man hyung!”, Hyukjae rolls his eyes, but completes his answer at the strict gaze of Yesung, “No, I don’t have any fixed appointments tomorrow.”.

“Fine. Still, let us get some rest.”, Yesung persists, grabs Hyukjae with one hand by one of his shoulders, spins him around and shoves him gently forward and out of the kitchen area.

“Yaah, why do you always have to be so patronising!”, Hyukjae argues without any heat and shuffles along the hallway in front of Yesung.

They have come to halt in front of Yesung’s door and Hyukjae has turned around to face his hyung again.

“Because I’m your hyung and I know what’s good for you.”, Yesung resolutely replies.

“Is that so?”, Hyukjae responds coquet and his eyes get huge the second the words leave his lips.

Yesung stares at him blankly.

“Y-yes,”, his hyung actually stutters out, then he recollects himself and adds with narrowed eyes , “Don’t provoke me now, Hyukjae-ah.”.

Hyukjae, being too shocked about his own behaviour, isn’t really able to come up with any answer and just nods, laughing again nervously.

Yesung shakes his head. “I really don’t get you sometimes.. and now be quiet, you might wake up the others!”.

Hyukjae closes his mouth on command. “Sorry.”, he whispers.

Yesung can only shake his head again, but a smile circles his lips as he does so.

“I’m just glad we’re back to normal again.”, Yesung whispers back, and out of the blue Hyukjae finds himself in a half-hug. He sharply pulls in some air and stretches out his arm, so Yesung doesn’t catch his glass of water while hugging him.

He is instantly surrounded by the smell of the older one and his face is pressed into the other’s shoulder while one of Yesung’s arms is slung around his middle. He can feel the warmth of his hyung’s hand seeping through his shirt at his back and Yesung’s hair is slightly tickling his neck. Hyukjae closes his eyes and tries to control his heart beat, but as sudden as the hug happened, so sudden Yesung lets go of him in the next second.

Hyukjae isn’t sure what expression his face is wearing when Yesung steps out of the hug, but he is almost sure it is something close to a mixture of shock and awe.

Yesung is smiling and extents his free hand to shortly comb Hyukjae’s hair back.

“Sleep well, Hyuk-ah.”, he says and Hyukjae can only nod.

“You too, hyung.”, he whispers and Yesung opens the door to his room. And just a moment later Hyukjae is alone in the hallway, heart beating like crazy and his mouth feeling dry.

He glances at his water and takes a sip. Then he breathes deeply in and out once, turns around and seeks out his bed himself.

* * *

When Hyukjae wakes up the next morning, he stretches his whole body, yawns tiredly and tries to get his mind working to remember exactly what the dream he just had was about.

He involuntarily rubs his legs together, feeling strangely uneasy and as his consciousness slowly comes creeping back to him, he jerks fully awake.

Hyukjae groans desperately as his dream comes rushing back to him and he registers the reason for his discomfort being located between his legs.

_I seriously cannot believe this. I feel mocked by my own unconsciousness and my body as well._

He squeezes his eyes shut, willing the excitation of his body to subside, but all that happens is his mind wandering back to the dream and to Yesung, hugging him in the hallway the night before.

Hyukjae knows this is weak and that he is hitting a new low right now, yet he can’t help himself and one of his hands travels slowly over his chest downwards to his boxers. He cups himself through his underwear and lets out a shaky breath.

He lightly starts massaging his half-hardness through the material and gives up to keep his mind from going places.

He imagines Yesung being there with him, lying behind him, and that Hyukjae’s hand is in fact his hyung’s hand kneading him through the fabric.

_He feels Yesung’s breath at his neck and the older one purrs into his ear. “Hyukjae-aah, I really want to make you feel good.”._

Hyukjae’s whole body shudders and he moans quietly, slipping his hand underneath the underwear and wrapping it securely around his now hard length. He begins to move his hips in a slow rhythm while stroking himself teasingly.

_“Look at you, moving your butt against me so cute.”, Yesung chuckles and kisses his neck shortly, before letting his tongue glide over the exposed skin._

“Hyung..”, Hyukjae whines and he intensifies the movements around his cock.

_“Yes, sweetheart, what do you want?”, his hyung rasps out while he leaves wet kisses on Hyukjae’s neck and shoulder._

“I- I want more.”, Hyukjae breathes out.

_“Okay then, get on your knees, will you?”, Yesung responds in a slightly commanding voice._

“Yeah, okay.”, Hyukjae gasps and rolls onto his stomach, pulling down his boxers to have more room for his hand, before rising up onto his knees. His face pressed into the pillow, he starts sliding his hand over his cock again and teases the tip with his thumb, eliciting a choked moan from himself.

_“I like it so much when you moan like this.”, his hyung groans from behind. “Would you spread your legs a little bit further for me?”._

Hyukjae complies right away to the voice in his head.

“Please, Yesung, hyung, give me more.”, Hyukjae whimpers and speeds up his motions, increasing the pressure he is using. He thinks a second about getting the lube to be able to use his own fingers, but he is too far gone already, and only rocks his butt against the empty space behind him.

_“Oh Hyukee, I give you everything you want from me.”, Yesung’s free hand is grabbing Hyukjae’s hips and the latter can feel the older’s groin pressed against his behind._

Hyukjae moans at the imagination of Yesung’s hardness pushing against him. His hand wrapped around his length is now pumping relentlessly, and he can faintly make out that his climax is approaching.

Hyukjae’s breathing is unsteady, and with almost every stroke a groan slips from his lips.

“I want your fingers in me, please, I need this. I need more.”, he pants out into the clear room.

 _“What about my cock then?”, Yesung asks teasingly, thrusting his hips forward,_ and Hyukjae can only cry out as he abruptly spills himself over his hand and sheets.

He collapses onto his bed, face completely buried into his pillow, his breathing heavy and his chest rising and falling due to the aftermath of his orgasm.

After he had calmed down a bit, he sits himself up onto his knees, and scrunches up his nose as he frees his sticky hand from his now soft length. He reaches for some tissues and cleans himself up as best as possible.

Then he stands up on shaky legs and walks over to his closet, pulling out and on a fresh pair of underpants and throwing the other one into the laundry basket. 

He sighs shortly and decides to seek out the bathroom right away, to take a shower, hopefully without running into anyone. Therefore he grabs a few clothes, a towel and his phone and moves to leave the room.

When he opens his door, the hallway is empty, but he can hear voices in the living room and a short glance at his phone shows him that it is already 10 p.m. and everybody is possibly awake by now, except for Kyuhyun perhaps.

Hyukjae literally sneaks onto the hallway and hurries over to the bathroom. He gets there without meeting anyone and is ready to pat himself on the shoulder as he discovers that the bathroom door is locked.

He lifts his head and looks down the hall to the second available bathroom in their dorm, and just as he starts to march towards it, an unexpected sleepy Siwon steps out of his room, crosses the floor and disappears behind the bathroom door.

Hyukjae throws is head back in outrage.

_This is just…_

Grumbling, he goes back to his room, drops his fresh clothes on a chair and decides to at least get himself some tea in the kitchen until one of the bathrooms is free.

So he walks into the kitchen area which is deserted except for Donghae, who is sitting at the table and munching on his breakfast.

“Morning.”, Hyukjae mumbles, heading straight for the water boiler.

“Morning.”, Donghae replies while chewing his food.

Hyukjae turns the kettle on, rests his back against the edge of the counter and stares at his feet. Brief silence is filling the room. Then there is a short choking noise audible and Donghae’s laughter replaces the silence.

“What the hell happened to you?”, he addresses Hyukjae.

Hyukjae, completely unaware of what is going on, looks puzzled at his friend. “What do you mean?”.

Donghae laughs again. “You look, and excuse my language, fucked.”, he snorts.

“What??”, Hyukjae can feel his cheeks starting to heat up madly.

“You look like someone gave you a reeeal good time.”, Donghae is unable to stop his laughter and Hyukjae is sure his face is crimson by now.

“Shut up.”, he splutters.

But Donghae is in much too good a mood to notice the painful embarrassment of his friend.

“Had someone over last night?”, he actually dares to ask and winks at Hyukjae amused.

“No, I had not and now shut up!”, Hyukjae tries to keep his friend from continuing.

Donghae chuckles. “Alright, alright, so no mysterious visitor in the dorm, such a shame.”.

Hyukjae only huffs and is just about to turn around to finally pour some hot water when a freshly showered Kyuhyun strolls into the kitchen, with Shindong in tow.

“Who had a visitor?”, the maknae enquires, immediately catching up on Donghae’s last sentence.

“No one, I just teased Hyuk about it.”, Donghae supplies.

“You had a ‘guest’ last night?”, Kyuhyun aims his question directly at Hyukjae now.

Hyukjae groans and rolls his eyes, but turns around nevertheless, facing the maknae.

“No. I had not.”, he replies drily.

“Here at the dorm? While everyone was around? Kinky.”, Shindong chuckles and Hyukjae cannot believe this.

Though, before he can give his two members a piece of his mind, Ryeowook and Yesung saunter in as well.

And Kyuhyun isn’t missing one beat to state, “Eunhyuk-ah had someone over last night.”.

Ryeowook looks very perplexed at the maknae and then at Hyukjae, but the latter can only stare at Yesung, and the older one is staring right back.

“You had someone over?”, his hyung asks blank and unflinching. And Hyukjae doesn’t know what exactly is happening here, but he suddenly feels as if Yesung and him are the only two people in the room.

“No, hyung, there was no one here.”, he almost whispers, his voice weak and slightly trembling.

He notes that Yesung slowly scrutinizes the condition of his face and clothing until his hyung seems to come to a conclusion that is obviously not in Hyukjae's favour, since he afterwards spins around on the spot and marches out of the kitchen.

Hyukjae feels a wave of desperation collapse over him and before anyone is able to say something he bolts after Yesung, almost crashing into Leeteuk and Heechul on his way out.

The leader and Heechul turn their heads, surprised at the sudden chaos and Leeteuk asks into the room, “What is going on again with these two this morning?”.


	6. Frustration is a Nasty Companion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! Sorry I let you wait and also left you with a little cliffhanger last time.. I hope you will like this chapter, I actually struggled a little with it, so don't be too hard on me :")

Yesung stomps off, and the moment his feet land too hard on the floor while he is walking and leaving the kitchen, he knows his reaction is completely exaggerated. He knows, he should have joined the others in mocking Hyukjae, should have laughed at his dongsaeng for looking so wrecked, but he couldn’t. As he realized the dishevelled state of Hyukjae’s hair and the crumpled face with the strangely glassy eyes, he suddenly felt absolutely sure of it that the younger one hadn’t spent the night alone, even though he denied it.

_Yah, the way he denied it told everything! With a quiet, weak voice and his mimic full of guilt. Probably he did only yet notice how improper and risky it is to bring someone over to the dorm._

Yesung is mad. He is so inexplicably mad and he knows, he has absolutely no right to be. He marches down the hall and shortly thinks about heading out of the dorm, but he decides against it, thinking it would make his departure even more dramatic and suspicious than it already had been.

Therefore, he takes the direction to his room, trying to calm down his anger and to ignore the sickening feeling that is spreading in his stomach.

He reaches his door and has just managed to control his features into his composed facial expression when he hears someone rushing after him.

“Hyung!”, Hyukjae’s voice stops Yesung in his tracks, hand resting on the doorknob, and not a second later the younger comes screeching to a halt next to him, clearly a bit out of breath.

“Hyung,” Hyukjae breathes out, “can we talk? Please?”.

Yesung turns his face to look at his dongsaeng with an expression of absolute serenity. “What do you want to talk about?”.

Hyukjae looks at him slightly puzzled. “About the thing in the kitchen?”.

“What about it?”.

Hyukjae is just plain confused right now and the neutral expression of Yesung isn’t making him any less perplexed.

“I-.. I wanted to say that there was no one with me last night.”, Hyukjae speaks slowly, and he suddenly feels very dumb to clarify this.

“Okay.”, Yesung states free of any undertone and finally opens the door to his bedroom. Without waiting for Hyukjae to say something else, Yesung steps through the door and is about to close it in Hyukjae’s face.

Hyukjae blinks, but reacts fast enough to squish himself through the door slit before Yesung is able to shut it fully.

“But hyung, no one was there! We even met late last night in the kitchen and talked, you would have noticed someone coming right!?”, Hyukjae realizes that he sounds slightly desperate and flinches inwardly.

Yesung has his back towards the younger while walking further into the room, and he murmurs something Hyukjae doesn’t catch.

“What did you say?”.

“I said,” Yesung’s voice is strained, but he still tries to sound as neutral as possible as he turns around to face Hyukjae again. “the person could have already been there, waiting in your room while we talked.”.

Hyukjae gapes at his hyung. “What? Are you crazy?”.

He regrets the words as soon as he registers Yesung’s eyes narrowing.

“I mean.. I’m sorry. It’s just..”, and Hyukjae feels so surreal in this situation with Yesung. Though, the older one doesn’t let him finish this time.

“Why do you defend yourself so passionate for it anyway? It’s not as if you owe me or anyone an explanation.”, Yesung states calmly, his expression back to unreadable.

“But..”, Hyukjae isn’t sure what to say anymore, he is so confused about what is actually going on, and Yesung’s indifferent demeanour makes him feel restless.

“But?”, Yesung asks, his voice tainted a very tiny bit with exhaustion. 

“But I had no one over.”, Hyukjae just utters weakly.

Yesung only nods and repeats, “Yeah, okay.”.

He moves to turn his back to Hyukjae, obviously done with the discussion. But something in Hyukjae snaps and he grabs Yesung by his shoulders, desperately, almost crying out.

“No one was there! I- oh my, I- I was jerking off! I just had- a ‘good time’ all by myself, okay? And just for the record, this might be the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever told you. So, would you have the decency to believe me now?”, he breathes out the last part and his cheeks are on fire, he can feel it. He can also feel his heart thumping heavily in his chest.

Yesung stares at him, is expression absolutely surprised and perhaps a little bit shocked as well. But he stays completely silent and Hyukjae is near a nervous breakdown right now.

“Hyung. Please say something. I don’t want it to get awkward between us again, we just cleared things up.”, Hyukjae sighs tiredly and he lets his hands fall from Yesung’s shoulders, his own shoulders slumping in the process.

“Hyukjae-ah,”, Yesung positions one of his hands on the upper arm of the younger one. “I meant it, it’s okay, it doesn’t matter if someone was there or not, you don’t have to explain yourself. And we’re okay, of course we are.”.

Hyukjae looks at Yesung, and in his head it screams. _Then why did you leave the kitchen being so upset? And why can I not get rid of the feeling that you’re still not believing me?_

However, he keeps quiet and slightly nods.

“Okay?”, Yesung asks.

“Okay.”, Hyukjae answers and he wonders why he feels so defeated all of a sudden.

* * *

Meanwhile in the kitchen, Leeteuk looks expectantly in each face of his dongsaengs.

Kyuhyun clears his throat, still a little surprised from Yesung’s departure and by Hyukjae hastily stumbling after him.

“There was this joke that Eunhyuk-ah had someone over last night…”, he answers.

Ryewook is wearing a deep frown on his face. “I’m worried about Yesung hyung, why was he so upset?”.

“Maybe they are fighting over the someone from last night.”, Heechul giggles.

“But Eunhyuk-ah said there was no one here!”, Ryeowook is rolling his eyes at his hyung.

“He could have been lying.”, remarks Kyuhyun.

“Maybe Yesung is jealous that he wasn’t the person Hyukjae had over!”, Heechul spins his thoughts further and while he starts to laugh, he registers Ryeowook shooting him a very narrowed gaze.

“Haha, funny, really.”, the younger one states.

During the ongoing banter Leeteuk’s eyes are resting on a quiet Donghae at the kitchen table. He crosses the space and sits down beside Donghae without attracting attention from the members who are by now heatedly discussing what might be going on between Yesung and Hyukjae.

“I’m sure Hyukjae did something stupid.”, Ryeowook accuses the rapper.

“Why do you think Hyukjae did something wrong?”, Shindong interjects, but adds right away, “Sorry, never mind.”, and Ryeowook gives him a knowing look.

“Yesungie can be very much complicated himself though.”, Heechul points out.

“Donghae-ya”, Leeteuk quietly addresses his dongsaeng. “It might be time to tell me what you know.”.

Donghae is wearing a troubled expression, but he nods. “Yeah.. I suppose. But don’t expect too much. I can only tell you that I know that Hyuk is.. that he has, like, that Yesung hyung is special to him in a way that goes beyond friendship. I guess it can be said this way. But I really don’t know why Hyuk looked so guilty when Yesung came in and asked if he really had someone over. And I for sure don’t know what Yesung’s reaction was about.”

Leeteuk looks at Donghae with kind and rather unsurprised eyes. “Do you think they might both have feelings for each other which go beyond friendship?”, he asks mildly.

Donghae’s gaze widens as he lifts his head to face his leader. “I-, do you think so? It would explain Yesung hyung’s response though..”, for a few seconds, Donghae loses himself in his thoughts. Then he focuses on Leeteuk again.

“Did you know?”, he inquires insistently.

Leeteuk smiles very lightly. “No, I didn’t know. They are both not easy to read, but well, I, lets say, I had a gut feeling.”.

“So... are we going to do something about it?”, Donghae asks carefully.

“Maybe you could talk to Hyukjae-ah again and give him something like.. a small hint.”, Leeteuk proposes.

Donghae laughs shortly. “Do you think he would actually believe me when I tell him that Yesung might see more in him than just a friend? And even if he does, this childish stubborn brat would probably never do anything about it anyway.”.

Leeteuk’s gaze turns thoughtful. “Ye can be very stubborn and unreasonable himself. I don’t know if he would be the better option to drop hints in this case.. additionally in his position as Hyukjae’s hyung. He might feel too responsible to act on any feelings he might have.”.

“That means we have two dumb fools who will probably both never admit what they feel for each other, because they are too pig-headed?”, Donghae puffs out some air, shaking his head.

Leeteuk grins. “Well, I’d still suggest you talk to Hyukjae, at least give it a try. But maybe some group activities, where they cannot constantly avoid each other, will do the situation some good as well. I wanted to hold an evening with all the members, some snacks, games and drinks anyway.”.

Donghae can’t help but chuckle at Leeteuk’s sly smile. “Alright, if that’s the case, I’ll try my best and talk to Hyuk, and I leave the rest to you.”.

“Yah! What are you two whispering over there the whole time?”, Kyuhyun interrupts them with piercing eyes.

“Kyuhyun-ah, did anybody ever tell you that you’re too curious for your own good?”, Leeteuk smiles innocently at their maknae.

“You two, you know something! I can see it in your allegedly unbothered faces. What is it? Tell me.”, Kyuhyun doesn’t let the matter go.

“Yah, talk with respect to your leader!”, Heechul interjects and grabs Kyuhyun by his arm.

At this moment, Siwon decides to enter the kitchen and he instantly picks up on the strangely loaded atmosphere in the room.

“What the hell is going on here?”, he asks, looking with raised eyebrows at Heechul’s hand closed around Kyuhyuns wrist.

“Some weird conflict is going on between Yesung hyung and Hyukjae-ah.”, Shindong explains helpfully.

“And why are these two almost at each other’s throat then?”, Siwon questions, referring to Heechul and Kyuhyun.

“Ay, it’s nothing, the discussion just got a little heated that is all.”, Leeteuk says while standing up. He walks the few steps over to Heechul and Kyuhyun and peels the older one’s hand off the maknae’s wrist. Heechul is not protesting, but as Kyuhyun speaks up again, he shoots the younger one narrowed glances.

“Nothing? Leeteuk hyung and Donghae hyung certainly know something we don’t, and I would really appreciate if they’d share.”. Kyuhyun is ignoring Heechul, his eyes now fixed on Donghae, who is slightly squirming under the look.

“How about we leave, whatever dispute they have, to them. I wanted to ask you something else anyway.”, Leeteuk states, still calm and unwavering.

“I swear, if Hyukjae made Yesung hyung upset..”, Ryeowook mumbles lowly under his breath, but quietens down at Leeteuk’s slightly raised eyebrows.

“What did you want to ask us?”, Donghae speaks up for the first time, since Hyukjae and Yesung had left the kitchen.

Leeteuk, now smiling warmly at the members and maybe a little thankful at Donghae, begins to talk right away.

“We’re already living together for several weeks now, but there weren’t that many possibilities we could spend an evening together, eating and playing some games as a whole. So, I checked everyone’s schedules and I think we are all free tomorrow, at least until the afternoon, if I got it right. Therefore, how about we announce this evening as a members only playdate?”, Leeteuk chuckles at the end and watches his members expectantly.

The responses are unanimous, everyone is nodding and making agreeing noises.

“Lovely idea, hyung.”, Siwon lights up at the suggestion.

“What is a lovely idea?”, Yesung’s voice interrupts and almost all seven heads in the room whirl around to look at the two persons standing a little bit shy in the doorway.

“Tonight is game night, everyone’s attendance is mandatory.”, Kyuhyun replies with a little bit of a strict tone, and except for Yesung and Hyukjae, everyone is aware of the maknae planning to get more information about the conflict between these two through the activities this evening.

“Oi..”, Hyukjae looks surprised.

“It was Teukkie hyung’s idea.”, Heechul throws in, his eyes downright screening the two in the doorway.

“Well then,”, Yesung enters the conversation again, “sounds like fun.”, he notes, his voice slightly strained. 

“Yeah..,”, Hyukjae is wearing a small frown, but nods. “Sounds good. So, tonight in the dorm or are we going out?”.

Everyone’s eyes turn back to their leader. Leeteuk just smiles, “In the dorm, we’re more protected from curious eyes in here.”.

“Wouldn’t be so sure about that.”, Donghae whispers under his breath with a slightly worried glance sideways at Kyuhyun and Heechul, who were both focusing their gaze at Yesung and Hyukjae again the moment Leeteuk started talking.

“Alright. Cool.”, Hyukjae adds and it arises a short silence in which Yesung and Hyukjae become well aware of the analysing eyes of their members, most of all Heechul and Kyuhyun’s.

“Okay, I can’t take this. What is going on with you two? Care to elaborate?”, Heechul finally blurts out.

Hyukjae, completely caught off guard opens his mouth, but realizes right away that he has absolutely no clue what to say.

“It was a misunderstanding. Everything’s fine now.”, Yesung states unagitated and Hyukjae is only able to stare.

“A misunderstanding?”, Heechul’s eyes grow a little wide at the plain response.

“So, you weren’t fighting about the guest Hyukjae had over? No love triangle?”, Kyuhyun jumps in.

“For god’s sake…”, Hyukjae starts, but Yesung cuts him short. “No, no love triangle and Hyukjae can have someone over without explaining anything to us, so drop it.”.

Hyukjae is speechless.

_Does he still not believe me? After I made a complete fool of myself in front of him and saying the most embarrassing stuff? Thankfully I didn’t also blurt out about whom I fantasized. Haha, yeah that would have just been the cherry on top._

“Actually..,”, Leeteuk disrupts, “I would like to keep up the old dorm rules. So only members are allowed in here, no one else.”.

“Yeah, I agree.”, Ryeowook scrutinizes Hyukjae with his eyes.

The latter though had enough, he throws his arms in the air, and with a “Fine!”, he turns around, heading for his room.

_I really really need this shower now, or I might just explode._

“Seriously, guys, I don’t think he had someone over. It was just a joke of mine.”, Donghae feels responsible to clarify again.

Siwon just shakes his head about the scene in front of him. “Honestly, what is this drama?”.

* * *

When Hyukjae enters his room after taking a shower, Donghae is already seated on a chair at the desk, obviously waiting for him. Hyukjae registers him a little bewildered.

“Hey, what are you doing in here?”, he asks his best friend while pulling a hoodie over his head.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean my joke to blow up in your face like this.”, Donghae begins talking.

Hyukjae sighs and lets himself sink down onto his bed. “It’s okay, I know you were joking. It’s not your fault it blew up like this.”.

“Yeah.. You might be right. So… why was Yesung so mad about you having someone over?”, Donghae cuts straight to the point and Hyukjae lifts his head startled to look at his friend.

“He wasn’t mad.. Well, he was, but he wasn’t because I had someone over, I guess. Or he was, but I told him that there was no one here. Though, I’m not sure he believed me, even though…”, and at this point Hyukjae stops talking. “Honestly, I have absolutely no idea what he was mad about.”.

“I thought he wasn’t mad?”, Donghae questions, his forehead in wrinkles.

“Yeah, well, I first thought he was, because of the way he stormed off, but when I asked him about it, he said he wasn’t mad and that everything is okay between us.”.

Donghae feels himself getting really confused, but while he examines the face of Hyukjae he detects that his friend is feeling exactly the same.

“But you thought or are still thinking that there is something wrong between you two?”, he requests cautiously of Hyukjae.

“I-, I felt such a strong urge to clarify that there was no one.”, Hyukjae utters, without answering Donghae’s question.

“He seemed mad to me too, so I get that you thought you had to clear it up.”, Donghae supports his friend, ignoring that Hyukjae didn’t go into his actual question.

“Yes, right?”, Hyukjae’s eyes get more lively at the confirmation of his own sensing.

“I hate that he acted so calm and controlled instead of telling me why he is upset!”, Hyukjae’s voice has adopted a more accusing and animated tone.

“Why isn’t he being sincere with me? I even went after him to explain and he pretended to not be angry. I really don’t understand him! And it makes me feel kind of.. helpless to be honest.”, crestfallen and in thought, Hyukjae’s gaze focuses on the floor.

“Yeah.. it’s understandable you’re feeling like this. After all, Yesung left the kitchen like a very jealous lover.”, Donghae states, chuckling lightly and a little bit awkward.

“What?”, Hyukjae’s head snaps up and he stares, eyes wide and round at Donghae.

“I mean.. his reaction was very.. intense. A little too expressive for something that firstly hasn't proved to be right and secondly something that he would normally have mocked you about for ages.”.

Hyukjae is still staring blankly at his friend and Donghae sighs.

“Did it never occur to you that Yesung might have some feelings for you too which are not fully platonic?”, he goes on carefully.

“What?”, Hyukjae croaks.

“Hyuk-ah, I think he might have been jealous about that someone you had over last night.”, Donghae elaborates patiently.

“But,”, Hyukjae’s cheeks are left pale and bloodless. “I had no one over.”, he only repeats weakly for the millionth time.

Now Donghae stares back. “Are you hearing what I’m saying?”, he asks incredulous.

“I- I’m not sure.”, Hyukjae answers hesitantly.

“Hyukjae-ah, your feelings for Yesung, are they still present? Are they as strong as ever?”. Donghae is aware that he is moving on dangerous territory with addressing this topic, but he also thinks it might be time for Hyukjae to not ignore and bury these feelings anymore.

Hyukjae’s face is heating up, a pinkish blush is spreading on his previously pale cheeks and he starts rubbing his hands over his thighs nervously.

“Why are you talking about this again? It’s the second time already in a short period and we once agreed on not mentioning it ever again.”, he dodges Donghae’s question.

“I know.”, Donghae succumbs at first. “But these last days, the atmosphere between you two was really tense. And I’m not sure if I’m completely in the picture of what happened that caused this tension between you both, however, considering Yesung’s apparent jealousy from earlier and your obvious strain with this whole conflict, it might be time to come clean.”.

“I don’t think he was… wait, what do you mean, ‘come clean’?”, Hyukjae interrupts himself in the middle of his sentence, his eyes jumping frantic over Donghae’s face.

“What else than jealousy should have caused his excessive reaction from before? And I mean, I think you should come clean about what you feel for him. Or at least try to talk to him about it.”. Donghae recognizes the doubt and insecurity in Hyukjae’s eyes the moment he finishes his phrase and he can only watch as the walls come up behind Hyukjae’s eyes.

“No way. I told you before and I’ll tell you again: There is no way that I’m going to tell him.”, Hyukjae closes off and with a kind of dismissive tone he adds, “And I’m pretty sure he was not jealous. That’s ridiculous.”.

Donghae sighs in despair. “Please, Hyukjae, don’t shut me out now, just because you’re uncomfortable. I really think you should seek out a conversation with Yesung hyung. It might give you both.. closure.”, he attempts to hold on to Hyukjae.

Hyukjae stays silent for a few seconds, then his look changes to a warmer gaze again and he sincerely begins to speak.

“Hae. You don’t understand. If I tell him, I first of all would probably not be able to finish my confession because I would die out of anxiety and embarrassment beforehand. And secondly, just imagine he wouldn’t know how to react. I would make him feel so uneasy, he would start to treat me differently and I would never be able to look him in the eyes again. Oh god, just thinking about it makes me break into a nervous sweat.”. Hyukjae runs his hands over his face and through the still damp hair.

“Hyuk-ah, not to be like this, but isn’t he treating you differently already these days? And aren’t you already almost a tense wreck when you communicate with him?”, Donghae doesn’t let it go.

Hyukjae lets his hands fall back into his lap and gapes at his friend. “This is.. harsh. Though, I fear it’s impossible to deny that you might be a tiny bit right. Oh my.. I guess everyone noticed something going on by now anyway.”, and Hyukjae groans lowly while he lightly hits one of his hands against his forehead.

Donghae can’t help but laugh out loud. “You can bet they noticed.”.

“What about,”, Donghae starts calmer again, “we spend the evening with the guys, have some fun, maybe you can let the topic rest a bit and give yourself a break, and tomorrow you will think about my suggestion?”.

Hyukjae eyes him sceptically, but finally he nods. “Yeah, okay. I mean.. you’re right about that it can’t continue like this. And for real,”, he continues in a more defiant voice, “I still feel so confused about hyung’s sudden unbothered and calm behaviour! And furthermore, I can’t help to think he didn’t take my explanation about spending last night alone serious and that really itches me too!”.

Donghae quickly thinks about asking Hyukjae if the other even listens to what he is saying, because it sounds like he and Yesung are already in a relationship and Hyukjae is the boyfriend who is falsely accused of cheating in this scenery. However, he decides against it, already able to picture the spluttering and denying rants he would have to endure from his friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually got sucked in by [twitter](https://twitter.com/TeazGreen) now too. I'm still getting used to it, but if you want to dm me you can do that and I am happy to interact! :) and please don't be shy... because I am already haha <3 <3


	7. Pillow Fights are Still a Thing, Alright?

Donghae left after he and Hyukjae agreed on meeting in the living room soon, so Hyukjae wouldn’t ponder too long about the thing with Yesung.

The freshly showered man lays himself fully down on his bed and stares into nothingness. Hyukjae knows it is bound to happen that his thoughts go back to Yesung if he doesn’t keep himself busy. But still he is unable to start focusing on something else before his mind provides him with this absolutely nightmarish embarrassing moment where he gripped Yesung’s shoulders, almost yelling in his hyung’s face.

“Goood, what is wrong with me?”, he groans into the silence that is currently filling his room.

Hyukjae struggles to wrap his head around this last week.

_How could everything be completely calm for months and in the short amount of one week everything’s just a whole mess. Well, everything regarding Yesung._

_That night doesn’t even seem real anymore and still.._

He sits himself abruptly upright.

_Maybe Hae is right and I should just tell him._

_Then again, I wasn’t the one acting strange today! Except for the too much information part maybe.._

_No, I will do as Hae suggested, not thinking about it today, getting a break and tomorrow I will.. I might put more thoughts into a solution for this._

Hyukjae nods his head in determination and gets up from his bed. He leaves his room and strolls into the living room where Donghae, Kyuhyun and Shindong are already gathered.

“Ahh, Hyuk-ah, there you are, come on, join us.”, Donghae smiles in his direction.

Hyukjae lets himself plop down onto a free space on the couches and slumps instantly further into the cushions.

“Where is everyone else?”, he inquires.

“Teukkie-hyung and Hee are making some errands for tonight and I think Wookie tagged along.. I don’t know what the rest is doing.”, Donghae answers, while he is back to focusing on his phone again, as he was when Hyukjae entered through the door.

Hyukjae turns his head frowning and looking at Kyuhyun, who sits obviously posing on the second sofa in the room, his body facing Donghae and apparently he is waiting for the latter to make a photo.

“Why are you holding one of our awards?”, Hyukjae asks deflected.

“Because Donghae hyung is going to take a picture of me with it.”, Kyuhyun retorts through gritted teeth to not change his facial expression.

“Yeah.. but why? Isn’t it an old award?”, Hyukjae doesn’t let it go.

“Yes, it is, but we talked about awards and I have a good hair day.. and why do I have to explain to you the reason I want to take a picture with this trophy?”, Kyuhyun replies, voice getting slightly strained from annoyance.

“Okay!”, Donghae interrupts, seemingly satisfied with the settings he performed on his phone to take the perfect picture. “Let’s do this.”, he smiles and lifts the camera.

* * *

After Hyukjae had surrendered to the nagging of the members and had left to take a shower, Yesung had shortly lingered in the doorway of the kitchen. Though, when the conversation in the room started to focus on the upcoming events of the evening and only Ryeowook’s eyes still rested slightly worried and analysing on his figure, Yesung decided it was a good time to leave as well, to get some fresh air and to clear his mind.

As he steps outside the building and onto the pavement, he takes a deep breath and only now he realizes how tight his chest has been feeling the whole time, since the encounter with Hyukjae in the kitchen this morning.

_Dear god, how many more ‘encounters in the kitchen’ are there supposed to be, before this whole stupid thing blows up completely._

_My act this morning was almost Hollywood-style… and didn’t help to calm the situation down. That’s for sure._

Yesung starts strolling down the street and he suddenly misses his dogs so much. The two of them are staying at his parents for the time he moved back into the dorm, because it would have been pure chaos if everyone had brought their pets to live there too.

_Well, chaos is there now anyway._

Yesung is experiencing the uncomfortable feeling of second-hand embarrassment and slight, really slight heat traveling through his body as he thinks about Hyukjae holding on to his shoulders and telling him that he jerked off all alone.

Yesung would close his eyes to concentrate on his cheeks to not heat up at the memory if walking wouldn’t require of him to fix his eyes on the ground to not trip over anything.

Hyukjae’s face had been so close to his own, the younger one’s breath coming fast and his chest heaving as if he had been running, and the air that was leaving his lips while he was talking so agitated, had softly brushed over Yesung’s skin.

It had happened so abruptly and fast that Yesung had been totally caught off guard, the proximity of their faces, resulting in him being able to clearly see Hyukjae’s wide and lively eyes, and the spoken words had given him the rest to go into complete shock.

He could have kissed him then and there. Everything inside him had been screaming at him to just bridge the gap and catch the younger’s plump lips with his own. To feel their softness and how they would give in under the pressure of his own lips.

Fortunately, Hyukjae had brought him back to his senses with the next phrase and Yesung had to shake himself inwardly to focus on the things his dongsaeng had been saying.

After their awkward conversation and after returning to the kitchen and being taken apart by their members, now with the chance to calm down his mind and to get his thoughts to slow down, Yesung realizes that he should believe what Hyukjae had said. There was no reason for doubting Hyukjae’s words, not after the self-embarrassment the younger got himself into to credibly explain that he had been alone that whole night.

Yesung reaches the entrance of the small park, where he had been sitting on a bench the last time he was brooding about Hyukjae, or better about his feelings towards his dongsaeng.

_I’m truly lucky if he didn’t notice that my jealousy was all over the place earlier._

He is just about to take the first step in the park as suddenly a hand reaches for his elbow and holds him back. He turns his head and faces Ryeowook, who has apparently jogged after him.

“Wookie..”, Yesung starts, but the younger one cuts him short.

“Hyung, I don’t know what is going on with you and Eunhyuk hyung, but I wanted to make sure you’re okay, or if you need someone to talk to. You know I’d always listen if you want me to.”.

Yesung’s mouth curls up into a warm smile. “I really don’t want to talk right now, but would you mind seeking out a bench and just spending some time with me?”.

Ryeowook nods his head right away. “Yes, of course hyung, let’s find a nice spot, shall we?”.

The two of them saunter side by side, peacefully and in silence into the area of the park. They find a small bench at the very beginning just beside the entrance, but still securely hidden from people passing by.

Yesung leans his back against the backrest of the bench, his head tilted back he closes his eyes and breathes deeply in and out. Ryeowook is seated right next to him, watching the people who are strolling through the park. They sit like that for several minutes until Ryeowook’s phone buzzes in his pocket and he takes it out to answer the call he is receiving.

“Hello?”.

Yesung can faintly make out the voice of Heechul on the other side of the line.

“I’m at the park just down the street with Yesung hyung, can you guys pick me up on your way?”, Ryeowook explains to Heechul.

“Okay, yes, thank you, see you soon.”, the younger hangs up and turns to address Yesung.

“Leeteuk and Heechul wanted to drive to the city to grab some things for tonight and I would tag along to make some errands myself. They come pick me up here in a few minutes, do you want to join us?”.

“Errands for tonight? Ahh, you mean for the evening activities.. I see.”, Yesung replies. “Thank you for asking, but I think I’d rather head back to the dorm. Maybe I will rest a bit before tonight, it promises to be a rather long evening.”, he smiles this small, a little tired but warm smile again and Ryeowook only nods his head in understanding.

They return to the entrance of the park and as soon as they step onto the pavement a car comes to stop in front of them. Ryeowook bids goodbye to Yesung and the latter watches as the younger climbs into the car where Leeteuk and Heechul are already seated. Yesung waves shortly and starts walking down the street in the direction of the dorm again.

With Ryeowook's company his mind had thankfully came to rest and kept quiet, even though he and Ryeowook hadn’t been talking. Now, with the younger one gone his thoughts wander off to Hyukjae automatically.

_Will I ever be able to stop thinking about him like that, now that I started?_

_What if this is going to accompany me now for a very long time? It’s only been several weeks and it completely messes with my head and heart._

_How the hell could I let myself slip like that, I screwed up so bad, even though it’s normally him who does stupid shit._

Yesung huffs, and he can’t help the tiny grin that creeps onto his lips when he thinks about Hyukjae being his dumb and gummy smile self.

He feels a deep and powerful tugging in his chest and stomach as his mind pictures Hyukjae smiling, laughing. His plump lips stretching and his eyes wrinkled at the edges.

However, almost instantly to the pulling he is experiencing while imagining Hyukjae’s face, a sickening feeling mixes up with the longing inside his guts.

Yesung begins to quicken his steps as if trying to outrun the slowly but surely descending awareness that these feelings for Hyukjae will most likely not disappear anytime in the nearer future and that the craving in his chest will haunt him, regardless of his attempts to shut it down.

And Yesung knows what it means if he can’t get his feelings in control. It means he has to talk to Hyukjae and explain himself before the younger finally realizes that his hyung is experiencing much more than only platonic affection for him. And Yesung really doesn’t want Hyukjae to find out by himself, the younger would probably freak out as a result because he wouldn’t know how to handle the discovery.

Yesung climbs the stairs to their dorm and turns the key in the door lock. He walks inside, closes the door and removes his shoes. As he moves down the hallway he hears noise and voices from the living room, so he drops his coat in his room and decides to check on what the others are up to.

When Yesung reaches the living room, he halts in his tracks before even entering the room fully. The reason for it being the absolutely weird scene that paints itself in front of his eyes.

Shindong and Donghae are kneeling on the floor, both hovering over their phones, intensively discussing something, while Kyuhyun is half-lying on one of the couches, but not in a slouchy, more like in a presenting manner and beside him with a little space in between is sitting Hyukjae, his hands clutching onto an old award which he holds in a demonstrative way towards Donghae and Shindong.

“Okay.”, Shindong suddenly says, and so far none of them noticed the new shape in the form of Yesung leaning against the door frame.

“We’re ready, let’s give it a try.”, Shindong says and Donghae lifts his phone, and now Yesung understands that it is about taking pictures of the two guys positioned so ridiculously on the couch.

Yesung has already made one step forward into the room, ready to ask what this stupid idea is about and why on earth Hyukjae is holding on to an old price, as the latter suddenly decides to make a pouty kissing face towards the award. His eyes are falling shut and he puckers his lips shamelessly.

Kyuhyun can’t help but look at Hyukjae and a grin spreads itself over his features, while Donghae starts taking pictures. But Yesung is just standing behind Donghae and Shindong, still at the door, and he cannot tear his gaze away from Hyukjae’s face, or more precisely, his lips.

They look so.. soft. He feels it again, this deep and strong pulling inside his chest. The desire to touch Hyukjae’s lips, to touch his face, to caress his cute rosy cheeks. He knows exactly how the younger one would react, either disgusted and withdrawing or all surprised, spluttering and slightly embarrassed with his face starting to flush, like during that night when Yesung simply grabbed him and touched him like he wanted to.

Yesung adores this second kind of response, adores this side on Hyukjae when the younger one feels slightly cornered, overwhelmed, a little insecure and most of all sheepish. It’s the most endearing look on his dongsaeng.

However, Yesung never knew that he apparently loves this side and the expression on Hyukjae's face also in situations of sexual arousal. Well, at least he didn’t really until that night.

_Would it be the same reaction if I kissed his lips?_

At this moment Kyuhyun spots him at the door. “Hey hyung, you’re already back! Want to join us?”, his face is tainted with a very good mood and it brings Yesung back from his current day dream.

“Ahh, Yesung hyung, join those two on the couch, we’re taking pictures!”, Shindong suggests as he turns around to identify Yesung as well.

Yesung strolls towards the side of the couch where Hyukjae is seated. The younger one had shortly opened his eyes to register Yesung in the room and instantly felt his stomach flip at the appearance of the older. But he had closed his eyes again as Donghae gave him a sign that he wants to continue taking the pictures. So, as Yesung sits down behind his back on the armrest of the couch, Hyukjae’s eyes are closed and his lips are again pursed, apparently in a kiss for the award.

Yesung can’t hold it back anymore. “You look stupid.”.

And without really opening his eyes, Hyukjae reaches behind himself and nudges with one hand blindly against Yesung’s body, the latter almost losing his balance on top of the armrest. However, Yesung catches himself in time, reaches out for Hyukjae’s shoulder and shoves him so that the younger’s face collides softly with the price still clutched between his hands.

“Idiot.”, Yesung states drily.

“Yah!”, Hyukjae turns around and outright pushes Yesung from the couch so that the older one lands on the floor.

“Ouch! You brat!”, Yesung yells.

And suddenly everything feels normal again and Hyukjae can only laugh loud, and his heart is light in his chest as he throws a pillow onto Yesung right after, hitting the older straight on the head and ruffling up his hair in the process.

“Just you wait..”, Yesung growls threateningly, but before he is able to scramble up from the floor, Kyuhyun joined the battle and struck a pillow over Hyukjae’s head in revenge.

“Heeey! I didn’t do anything to you, what was that for?”, Hyukjae complains noisily and Kyuhyun just shrugs. “K.R.Y. family always fights together.”.

“Well, if that’s the case..”, Donghae is audible from the front and with a “D&E for the win!”, he jumps at Kyuhyun.

Hyukjae instantly moves to assist Donghae, but in the meantime Yesung managed to grab the pillow Hyukjae had flung at him and is now standing up to attack is dongsaeng.

And as Hyukjae stumbles to his feet to flee from a maniac Yesung following him with a pillow raised high above the head, he all of a sudden looks forward to the evening activities. He might watch out for the amount of alcohol he is going to allow himself, but regardless of that he is ready to spend a hilarious evening with his friends.

When they finally crash on the couch, only after Shindong joined the general chasing and pillow flights as well, Hyukjae drops down beside Yesung, their bodies almost touching and Hyukjae’s giggles coming out in uneven breaths.

“Hyung, you’re really slow, you should pick up your workout on the treadmill.”, he teases Yesung the second enough air is filling his lungs again.

“You’re one to talk,”, the other retorts right away. “You’re gasping for air as if you had run a marathon and not just a few rounds around the living room.”.

Hyukjae lands a light kick against Yesung’s leg as response. “And still you weren’t able to catch me, because you were slooow.”, he mocks his hyung, changing his voice in the end to the well known tone he uses every time he tries to provoke Yesung.

“Yah! Are you feeling good being this rude?”, Yesung replies outraged and he hits Hyukjae in the face with the pillow he was just pressing against his stomach, however, the blow is rather gentle.

Hyukjae chuckles, drags the pillow from his face and turns his head to look at Yesung. The older one has leaned back, his eyes almost closed, and he blinks back at Hyukjae, the latter immediately feeling the butterflies erupt in his belly.

At this very moment he becomes aware that Donghae is right and that he is unable to continue burying these feelings at the bottom of his heart. Even though Yesung doesn’t know, that one special encounter between them seems to have forced Hyukjae to give up his fight against these emotions which always try to battle their way to the surface, whenever he is close to his hyung. But Hyukjae also realizes that it might actually be okay to not hide them anymore, at least not from himself.

He is still unsure if Yesung finally believed him that this stupid nocturnal visitor didn’t exist, and it is furthermore not clear to him, why his hyung reacted in the intense way he did at the false news.

However, just the way they are now resting side by side on the couch, pursuing their usual way of communicating, he thinks, in the end, regardless of all the incidents and his feelings, everything would probably be okay between them anyway, because this is Yesung and their friendship is strong since the time they started opening up to each other in their trainee days.

Moreover, if their banter helps to dissolve the tension between them and gets them back to being their usual selves around each other, the younger is quite willing to increase his efforts in teasing his hyung again. And if it additionally heightens the number of times Yesung reaches out for Hyukjae, touches him or gives his attention to the younger one, then that’s something Hyukjae is ready to enjoy as well. 

But before Hyukjae is able to come up with something provocative once more, Leeteuk, Heechul and Ryeowook appear in the doorway and stare at the five men sprawled all over the sofas, trying to catch their breaths.

“Do I even want to know what was going on here just now?”, Ryeowook speaks up as the first one.

“Did you seriously start a pillow fight without me?”, Heechul looks downright upset and Leeteuk is only shaking his head, the grocery bags in his hands rustling at the movement.

“Ahh, hyung, don’t be mad, you know these things only happen spontaneously.”, Kyuhyun apologizes to Heechul, but the older one is having none of it.

“Then make sure I’m around the next time you’re being spontaneous! I can’t believe I missed this, this..”, Heechul gets interrupted through one of Leeteuk’s bags hitting softly against his side.

“You shouldn’t engage in such dangerous running around anyway Hee, so stop complaining and help me store away the snacks for tonight.”, and without any further words Leeteuk presses one of the bags into Heechul’s hands, grabs with his now free hand the other’s elbow and guides Heechul to the kitchen area.

“Well.”, Yesung states into the new developed silence. “I think I might get some rest before we start later tonight.”, and he begins to lift himself up from the couch. His hand automatically searching for support to push himself up, props itself on Hyukjae’s thigh that is resting directly beside him.

Hyukjae flinches at the sudden pressure on his leg, and when he registers Yesung’s hand resting on top, slightly pressing down due to the weight the older one is putting on it, he instinctively covers the smaller hand of his hyung with his own and briefly brushes his thumb along the skin in the process.

The touch is sending tingles all over his skin, similar to the time their hands brushed against each other when Yesung had unsuccessfully tried to pass Hyukjae the glass of water.

Yesung turns his head, surprised at the sudden contact, and Hyukjae hastily starts to excessively pat his hyung’s hand and retorts distractingly “Fine, old man. Make sure to wake up in time.”.

If Hyukjae wouldn’t know better, for a second he would have thought Yesung was lightly blushing and leaving his hand buried under the younger one’s for a second longer than necessary, before completely standing up and withdrawing his arm.

“Yayaya.”, Yesung replies. “Don’t you worry, I’ll be there, promise.”, and Hyukjae feels a little speechless at the cheeky grin that appears on Yesung’s face, before the older one walks towards the living room door, to leave for his bedroom.


	8. Game Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I know it's been ages.. I really hope you'll like this chapter, it's a littler longer again, maybe you can count it as apology :3 <3
> 
> Short remark: I know Heechul is in a relationship and I don't mean to disrespect Momo with not including her in this story.

Hyukjae rises from his seat on one of the couches, moves through the living room to the window and back, just to finally sit down on another spot of the couch. It’s the third time he has done that by now and he slowly but surely gets fidgety.

It’s already turning dark outside and Hyukjae, Donghae, Ryeowook, Leeteuk, Siwon and Heechul have gathered in the living room as the early ones of the group. With Ryeowook’s aid, Leeteuk has arranged a variety of snacks and sweets on the table in the middle of the two couches. It’s so much, it almost makes the bottles of booze disappear if their bottlenecks wouldn’t stick out of the heap of food on the piece of furniture.

Shindong, Donghae and Siwon are lounging on the sofas whereas Leeteuk is still bringing glasses and other equipment from the kitchen over to their get-together, Ryeowook on his heels ready to help whenever he can. Heechul, sitting on the floor, is busy scrolling through his phone, searching up games they could play later while Hyukjae can’t keep still in one place.

Kyuhyun and Yesung haven’t shown up yet and Hyukjae is completely occupied by pondering how he can place himself next to Yesung without being too obvious. He knows he has to be fast as soon as the older one arrives because in a matter of seconds Yesung will most likely be sandwiched between Kyuhyun and Ryeowook, and Hyukjae won’t have any chance to squeeze himself between those three.

It is the reason he has not chosen a fixed spot yet, but leaves his place every few minutes to move around the room, only to pick another place from which he gets up again a moment later.

“Goood, Hyukjae, what is up with the running around? It’s annoying!”, Heechul eventually grunts, without lifting his head.

Unusually, Hyukjae doesn’t respond or defends himself, instead he flops down on yet another couch cushion and is only barely able to prevent a sigh spilling from his lips.

He rises from his sitting position again, making a few steps into the room and now Heechul is actually looking at him, ready to snarl. However, this instant Kyuhyun and Yesung decide to finally show up and saunter through the living room door.

“Ahh, there you are, we’re almost ready, just pick a seat somewhere.”, Ryeowook comments sideways, just marching into the room as well while he is still carrying cups and glasses over from the kitchen.

Hyukjae, currently staying near one of the couches, witnesses in despair how Yesung strolls after Kyuhyun in the direction of the opposite couch. He tries to come up with any idea to catch the older one’s attention and to somehow delay Yesung sitting down on the couch Kyuhyun had himself thrown onto, next to Siwon.

But of course there is nothing Hyukjae could say. So he stares at his hyung, who has finally seated himself on the couch right beside Kyuhyun.

Yesung is very casually dressed for his standards, in rather lose pants and his shirt with the ‘hysteric bear’ print on it. Even though Hyukjae knows he in his ripped jeans and baggy sweater isn’t a fashion king himself tonight, he senses the chance here to rile Yesung up a little and maybe create the opportunity for him to unsuspiciously drop down on the seat next to his hyung.

“Yah! Yesung hyung, why are you dressed so sloppy?”, he scolds Yesung.

The latter’s head snaps up and his eyes instantly find Hyukjae’s, as if he was already precisely aware of where the younger one is currently staying in the room.

“What do you mean? This is just a get-together with the members!”, Yesung deflects Hyukjae’s offensive question.

“So you don’t care if you look ugly and underdressed around us? Are we not good enough for you to make yourself look at least appropriate?”, Hyukjae’s payback comes right away.

Yesung can’t help but stare openly at his dongsaeng. However, Hyukjae has started to slowly cross the room and is now standing almost directly in front of his hyung. Yesung has to lift his head even higher to still be able to look Hyukjae in the eyes, and slightly puzzled and with way less determination Yesung responds. “But I’m wearing accessories to make up for it…”.

He shakes his wrists to show off his bracelets and rings, before reaching for the necklace he is wearing and playing with it to display it to Hyukjae. The younger almost has to laugh, his eyes wandering over the rings to the wristbands up to the necklace held between Yesung’s fingers, and as he focuses in on his hyung’s collarbone which is slightly visible due to Yesung’s movements, the laughter suddenly gets stuck in Hyukjae’s throat and he states with a dry mouth. “They’re too much.”.

Yesung blinks at him, again caught off guard, this time by the unexpected change of tone in Hyukjae’s voice. But before the two of them can continue their conversation or their staring, Leeteuk and Ryeowook enter the room and simultaneously Heechul pipes up, declaring he has found enough games they could try out to fill the whole evening.

Nonetheless, Hyukjae realizes his chance and places himself down on the spot beside Yesung and he registers the slight pout and skeptical glance Ryeowook sends his way, before the younger one takes a seat next to Siwon’s other side.

After everyone found a comfortable seat, with Heechul continuing to sit on the floor, his back resting against a couch and Leeteuk joining Donghae and Shindong on said couch, Heechul claps his hands together excited. “Alright, let’s get this party started!” and Leeteuk can’t help the amused groan escaping his lips.

Heechul deliberately overhears the sound and proceeds motivated. “We should start with rock-paper-scissors and the one who’s losing has to drink!”.

“What?”, Ryeowook chimes in. “No way. Are you just trying to get us drunk by playing the easiest game of them all?”.

“Of course not!”, comes Heechul’s outraged response that no one believes even for a second. “It’s just for.. getting into the mood. Come on!”.

“To get into what kind of mood exactly?”, Yesung skeptically engages in the conversation.

“Oh you know.. the fun mood.”, Heechul replies almost sheepishly.

Leeteuk, resting on the couch directly behind Heechul, is only shaking his head in mock exasperation, his legs dangling on the left and right side of Heechul’s body.

“We’ll play nine rounds.”, the leader announces. “So theoretically each of us gets to drink once.” and lightly mumbling he adds, “And then we hopefully play a real game, for god’s sake.”.

“What must the one losing drink?”, Hyukjae requests very careful, he has an unpleasant hunch of where this is heading.

“Shots?!”, Heechul and Kyuhyhun answer determined and simultaneously, and Hyukjae, Siwon and Ryeowook groan in response.

“I don’t want to, I’m getting drunk too easily.”, Hyukjae whines instantly.

“Hyukjae-ah, who says you’ll have to drink? There is the possibility that you won’t lose one single round!”, Heechul tries to persuade the younger one.

“I’m in.”, Yesung’s voice is suddenly audible and Hyukjae’s and Ryeowook’s head spin around to gape at their hyung.

“Why not? The chances are high to not have to drink even one single shot and even one is really not that much, and every one of us should be able handle it.”, Yesung speaks calmly.

“You know though that this is only the beginning and Heechul hyung has probably a lot more tricks up his sleeve to get us drunk?”, Hyukjae addresses Yesung, his eyes slightly narrowed in incredulity.

Yesung is not really sure why he thinks that playing stupid games and drinking most likely too much alcohol would be a good idea tonight, but if he is honest he feels like doing it. Just silencing his thoughts for the evening and having some easy fun with his friends.

“I know. But I thought that’s the reason we’re gathered here anyway, so why delaying it?”, Yesung retorts, his eyes focusing on Hyukjae’s and the latter is lost for words. Yesung doesn’t seem to notice the blackout of his dongsaeng and turns his head to Siwon, who’s joining the conversation now as well.

“Why am I afraid Hee has a plan to get us wasted even before midnight?”.

Hyukjae doesn’t listen, he scolds himself inwardly for being so easily distracted just by Yesung’s gaze.

But the older one is just too close. Hyukjae can clearly see how Yesung’s soft black hair frames his delicate features, the small wrinkles that appear on his face when he talks or reacts to something, and he can smell his hyung’s perfume. Hyukjae’s leg brushes against Yesung’s, just for a second and Hyukjae knows, is painfully aware of himself doing it on purpose.

Yesung senses the touch right away and returns his attention to Huykjae. He smiles at the younger one, mild and tender and Hyukjae is completely perplex as Yesung’s hand reaches for his thigh, squeezing it shortly before drawing back again.

“I’m on Yesung’s side here, what are you all whining about? Didn’t we want to have a good time? Let’s play already!”, Shindong takes up on Yesung’s position.

“Right, let’s start.”, Heechul scrambles onto his knees and all the members join the movement of stretching out their arms, half of them grinning in delight the other half groaning in complaint.

* * *

“No way!”, Hyukjae exclaims as he loses his second round of rock-paper-scissors. They are at the sixth round of the game and until now Leeteuk, Shindong, Ryeowook, Siwon and Hyukjae each had to drink one shot. Heechul had filled each of the glasses to the brink with the comment, “That it’s worth it!” and now Hyukjae has to down another one of those small glasses that are far too full to be called shots.

“It’s called karma, Eunhyuk-ah.”, Kyuhyun grins and Hyukjae throws him a narrowed gaze.

He doesn’t lose any other round, instead Leeteuk has to drink once more and Kyuhyun and Yesung both lose one game as well. The latter scrunching up his nose when he swallows the liquor and Hyukjae catches himself defining it as ridiculously adorable.

He can already make out the distant feeling of strong alcohol spreading throughout his body and it’s making him feel lively and a little weightless. So when Heechul proposes to play a different game Hyukjae is actually excited and he can see in the eyes of his members that Heechul has apparently been successful with creating the ‘fun mood’.

In the heat of the game everyone has stood up from their seats and is now collapsing back onto the couch or in Heechul, and this time also Kyuhyun’s and Ryeowook’s case, back onto the carpet, leaning their backs against the sofas behind them.

“Alright!”, Heechul’s enthusiasm hasn’t subsided, a cup held securely in his left hand is filled with beer he poured himself after realizing he might have to go through the whole rock-paper-scissor game without getting even one single shot, what actually turned out to be true.

Ryeowook, Kyuhyun, Donghae, Shindong and Siwon did mix themselves some cocktails or got some beer as well after the first rounds and are now happily and pleased sipping on their drinks.

“Next is Truth or Dare!”, Heechul proposes without any shame and this time Donghae chimes in.

“I feel like a freaking teenager.”, he comments and Heechul glares at him.

“You _are_ like a freaking teenager!”, he retorts and Donghae pouts right away.

However, Ryeowook seems to have found his own motivation for playing and he interrupts the two.

“Can I start? Can I ask whoever I want?”, he inquires and Heechul lifts his right hand in a calming motion.

“Slow down there!”, he starts. “First of all everybody needs a drink and if I’m seeing this right Hyukjae-ah, Yesungie and Teukie are still without one!”.

“Then serve us party leader!”, Hyukjae demands in a feigned voice and Yesung nods his agreement at Hyukjae’s side.

“I’ll mix them!”, Kyuhyun suddenly announces out of the blue and scrambles towards the table, kneeling with his back to Yesung and Hyukjae and therefore shielding their vision on his task at hand. And if a little too much alcohol landed in their cups before Kyuhyun handed them over, it was totally on purpose.

“And who makes one for me?”, Leeteuk asks after watching Kyuhyun putting the two drinks together with a focused expression.

“I will.”, Heechul instantly states his voice calm, but his eyes show a little delight.

“You can start then, Wookie, you can pick whoever you want.”, he adds before leaning forward to get Leeteuk a filled cup.

“Don’t call me that.”, the younger complaints sulking a little, but his eyes get bright again right after and he turns to Yesung.

“Hyung, truth or dare?”, he asks with a honest smile.

Yesung lowers the glass he has just been sipping on and glances surprised at his dongsaeng.

“Me? Why me?”, he requests a little stunned.

“No, hyung, you’re supposed to answer ‘truth’ or ‘dare’, not ask a question in return, that’s not how it works.”, Hyukjae corrects him while patting Yesung’s thigh forgivingly.

“Yah! Shut up, I’m not stupid!”, Yesung retorts immediately and grabs Hyukjae’s hand on his leg to stop the patting.

“It’s alright hyung, we know you’re a little slow sometimes, it comes with the age.”, Hyukjae smiles innocently at Yesung and the latter’s eyes watch him threateningly.

Though, then Yesung all of a sudden decides to ignore the mocking of his dongsaeng and turns back to Ryeowook.

“Dare, and please make me hit him.”, Yesung finally answers the question, his hand still clasping Hyukjae’s, but he seems to be unaware of it and Hyukjae is so busy concentrating on the feeling of the others hand around his that he almost misses Yesung’s response.

“Yah!!”, Hyukjae complains right away and Ryeowook looks undecidedly back and forth between those two.

“I- I actually wanted you to sing something for me.”, Ryeowook eventually speaks up hesitantly and focuses his gaze on Yesung again, his smile back in place.

Hyukjae can’t help himself and he feels the jealousy emerge from deep within him. The jealousy over Ryeowook being able to show his adoration and affection for Yesung so easily, so cringe worthy. And the look the older one throws Ryeowook is warm and intimate, it openly shows the meaningful connection they share with each other and Hyukjae’s stomach contracts at the thought that he might never be as close to Yesung as Ryeowook.

Therefore he does the only thing he knows to do, the only way to handle the jealousy and to also draw Yesung’s attention away from the other and back to him. He begins imitating Yesung’s singing the second the older one starts.

Yesung’s head snaps around, his gaze concentrated to not get distracted by the annoying huehing of his dongsaeng beside him. Hyukjae grins at him boldly and increases the volume of his imitation and a small wrinkle develops on Yesung’s forehead, between his eyes until he suddenly drops Hyukjae’s hand he was still holding on to, slings one arm around the younger’s shoulders, pulls him in and traps him in a headlock, his head pressed against Yesung’s chest.

The huehing sounds get weaker and there is a faint choking noise hearable from Hyukjae, though Yesung just smiles angelic and finishes the song on a clear and steady note before he releases his dongsaeng’s head.

“Maybe we should switch to another game..”, Siwon suggests slightly laughing. “This one seems to contain opportunities for a lot of trouble.”.

“I don’t see what’s wrong with a little drama, but fine.”, Heechul gives in.

“Hah! I bet Siwon-ah is just trying to hide his newest business plan from me!”, Shindong yells suddenly and Siwon jolts.

“You’re asking me about it for days already, so I know who you’ll pick and what you’ll want to know if it’s your turn!”, he responds.

“You could just choose ‘dare’ then!”, Shindong fights back and Siwon starts laughing for real now.

“And let you make me _dance_ my business plan? No thank you! We’re switching games, that’s it.”, Siwon replies resolutely.

For a second the members are gaping at them, then Heechul pulls himself together, he isn’t really sure how it happened but he is already sipping at his second cup and as he looks around he notices that most of the members are still rather careful about the amount of alcohol they are drinking. Especially Yesung and Hyukjae and this is really not in Heechul’s intention.

“Before we start the new game.. Let’s make a toast.”, he moves onto his knees and fills nine shot glasses with high-percentage liquor, before making an encouraging gesture with his hands for the other members to each grab a glass.

Everyone does without much hesitation and is watching Heechul expectantly.

“Uhmm..”, the latter begins stuttering. “Cheers to Teukie being a great dad who also manages to perfect this image with classic dad jokes.”.

They all stare at him, but still chug their drinks.

“Just do your love confessions in private please.”, Kyuhyun then mumbles and the others start giggling.

Leeteuk rolls his eyes and Heechul can’t fight the very light blush appearing on his cheeks.

Hyukjae has gone rigid beside Yesung the moment Kyuhyun said ‘love confessions’ and he is unable to stop himself from glancing sideways at his hyung. Though, Yesung’s eyes are fixed on Heechul and a small tight smile is circling his lips instead of the giggles which escape the others.

“Make you one then!”, Heechul shifts into a defensive position and glares at Kyuhyun.

“I sure will.”, the younger states immediately and everyone lets their glasses be re-filled by Heechul and Kyuhyun.

“So.”, Kyuhyun speaks up as everyone has their drinks ready in hands.

“A toast to Shindong losing money, Ryeowook having a chubby bottom, Siwon still looking like our dad in every picture, Donghae being a baby, Heechul apparently having no own home, Yesung still being unable to dance after all these years, Eunhyuk unsurprisingly being a hormonal driven teenager and Leeteuk being oblivious about his secretive admirer.”, he rushes out, tilts his head and downs the shot while everyone begins yelling at him chaotically.

“Just so you know, you suck at making toasts too!”, Heechul eventually ends the outrageous outbursts.

“I’ll make one.”, Leeteuk throws in and no one objects, so the glasses are filled another time.

Hyukjae feels his body buzzing, he’s had four shots in a relatively short amount of time now and it’s slowly starting to show, especially with this ridiculously strong cocktail Kyuhyun mixed him on the side. He blinks and realizes how he is automatically leaning into the warmth of Yesung beside him. The older one notices the motion and turns his head to look at Hyukjae.

“Are you alright?”, he asks and Hyukjae smiles happily at him.

“Yeah, I am, I really am right now.”, and shortly after his statement he could hit himself on the forehead for his obviousness, but Yesung just smiles back at him and then focuses on Leeteuk who is just about to make his toast.

“I’m very glad we found the opportunity to get together like this. I know everyone is very busy with different things these days, but it makes me happy that we still found the time to spend an evening like this together. And I know Heechul and maybe Kyuhyun too, I’m not sure about that, are trying to get us drunk as fuck so just down another one of those shots so that we can move on to another game, because I’m starting to feel bored. Cheers!”, he finishes and chugs the liquor.

“That’s how you make a toast!”, Shindong laughs and all of them raise their glasses before swallowing the burning liquid.

“Never have I ever and I’ll start!”, announces Heechul and puts his glass down on the table with a thump.

“Never have I ever had someone over at the dorm for some sexy time.”, Heechul’s grin is devilish and Hyukjae instantly groans angrily.

“I’m not drinking at this! I told you I was alone, drop it already!”, he exclaims.

“Don’t you have to drink yourself at that Hee?”, Leeteuk requests innocently from on top of the couch behind Heechul, and the latter suddenly blushes.

Hyukjae complains immediately. “That’s not how this game works! You aren’t allowed to have done it yourself!”.

All of a sudden Yesung engages in the conversation. “Let’s switch games again.”, he calmly demands and adds right after, “Hee, would you rather have some hot chick over or Teukie hyung?”, his grin is cheeky and Heechul gapes at him a second before accusing him.

“You cannot just change games! It’s not even your turn!”, Heechul defends himself.

“It’s my turn though.”, Hyukjae decides plainly and Heechul is almost yelling by now. “What kind of logic is that??”.

“Stop complaining and answer the question already!”, Shindong shouts back.

“Yes! I’m actually very interested in the response to that.”, Donghae giggles and Leeteuk leans himself slightly forward, so that he is near Heechul’s ear as he whispers.

“Watch your answer there Hee.”.

Heechul looks trapped and it’s a nearly stammered reply he pushes out. “Teukie hyung of course!”, he finishes it proudly, apparently sure to have made the right decision.

Everyone starts laughing and clapping and Yesung and Donghae join in with some whistling. Leeteuk can’t help the grin spreading over his face and lightly slaps the back of Heechul’s head.

“I said, watch what you’re saying!”, Leeteuk scolds him and Heechul is getting actually flustered by now. “But I thought…”.

“Okay!”, he then pulls himself together again. “Can we go back to playing ‘Never have I ever’ now?!”, he commands.

* * *

They got stuck with the game and were playing for quite a while now, and Hyukjae can’t tell if he’s had to come up with five or six Never have I ever’s already. What he can tell though is that everyone’s posture has loosened a lot.

Heechul’s head is resting against Leeteuk’s left thigh, Ryeowook and Kyuhyun did make themselves comfortable on the floor with cushions and through leaning against each other. Donghae’s eyes are falling shut from time to time and Shindong has put a pillow behind Donghae’s head and placed the other’s legs over his lap.

Siwon, Yesung and Hyukjae, sharing the couch only between the three of them have spread their body’s comfortably over the sofa. Hyukjae has leaned his upper body sideways near to Yesung on purpose so that their shoulders are almost touching. He is just about to close the small remaining gap and rest his body against the older one’s fully, when Yesung suddenly shifts, moves forward and starts mumbling something in Siwon’s direction.

Hyukjae bites his lip, he has almost whined out loud at Yesung’s movement. His vision clears a little after this and he tries to pull himself together, straightens up a bit on the couch. However, the alcohol in his veins is making him feel dizzy and slightly tired by now, and he catches himself longing to curl up against Yesung’s side.

Though, Yesung is talking to Siwon and Hyukjae is somewhere at the back of his mind aware that this is absolutely stupid, but he registers himself getting sulky because of it.

“Kyuhyun-ah, it’s your turn.”, Leeteuk reminds the maknae and the latter nods.

“I’m already thinking.. let me see.”, he answers with a pondering facial expression.

He turns his head a bit to look at Yesung and Siwon, and his gaze halts at Yesung’s hands.

“Never have I ever… been mocked for my tiny hands.”, Kyuhyun says slowly.

Shindong and Donghae laugh lowly and Heechul rolls his eyes.

“Lame.”, he huffs. “Only one of us has to drink at that.”, he adds.

However, Yesung being too involved in the conversation with Siwon doesn’t react. Noticing his chance and without further ado, Hyukjae throws one arm over Yesung’s back, leans closer and speaks right in to the older one’s ear.

“Yah! Old man, you have to drink! Didn’t you hear? Where are your hearing aids?”, he teases Yesung and the latter jolts a little in his seat at the sudden voice and air against his ear. He then faces Hyukjae, the younger one distances himself a bit from his hyung as he senses the scolding that is about to hit him.

“Could you stop these stupid jokes about me being old!!” Yesung shouts and Hyukjae laughs.

“Why are you screaming grandpa, I can hear you very well with my healthy young ears. I’m the one who has to raise their voice so you weak and senile old man can understand me.”.

“I’ll show you how weak and senile I am.”, Yesung growls and the next thing Hyukjae knows, a complete human body throws itself on him, buries him underneath and ends up making them both fall from the couch onto the floor.

“I seriously don’t know any longer if they’re fighting or flirting with each other.”, Siwon says, shaking his head a little as everyone in the room watches how Yesung tackles Hyukjae and starts wrestling with him on the ground.

To keep the upper hand, Yesung begins tickling Hyukjae and the younger squeals, trying desperately to switch their positions. He is not successful and soon Hyukjae is tortured by a hiccup resulting from the laughing and trashing around. Tears are forming in his eyes and his face heats up, his cheeks and ears coloring themselves in a light red.

Yesung realizes the struggles of his dongsaeng beneath him and stops the tickling to let Hyukjae catch his breath. The younger is heavily pulling air into his lungs and looks up at Yesung, who is nearly straddling him and who’s face is hovering closely over Hyukjae’s own.

Hyukjae can feel how the atmosphere changes in the few seconds he needs for his breathing to calm down a little. Suddenly there is Yesung’s hand at the side of his face, his fingers carefully picking up a strand of Hyukjae's hair and brushing it out of the younger man's eyes.

Hyukjae is holding his breath, his widened pupils are jumping back and forth between Yesung’s eyes until Yesung’s gaze fixates him and he just stares back at his hyung.

Yesung’s thumb slides over Hyukjae’s flushed cheek and the latter can make out the affection in the eyes of the other. Hyukjae feels powerless and overwhelmed, completely at the mercy of whatever Yesung decides to do next. It stirs a memory in his mind, the memory of lying in his bed at night, slightly turned to the side and Yesung hovering over him, combing the hair out of his face and asking him if he is alright.

> _Hyukjae feels his chest flutter as he looks into the deep and dark but calm eyes of his hyung. Behind the challenging look he sees there, he recognizes something he probably has never seen before in these eyes, and his stomach flips in response to the desire he can identify in Yesung’s gaze._
> 
> _"Are you okay?”, the older one asks suddenly, sounding worried and without stopping to affectionately comb Hyukjae’s hair. To his utter despair Hyukjae can only whimper as a reaction to the question._

As he looks into Yesung’s eyes he is strangely enough absolutely sure the other is thinking of the same memory at this moment. And then Yesung asks, in a low whisper, only for Hyukjae to hear.

“Are you okay?”, and Hyukjae’s face starts blushing madly as his mind provides him with ongoing details of the situation they were in days ago.

It is as if Yesung can follow his train of thoughts, because all of a sudden a light flush is spreading at the bottom of the older one’s neck too and with that Yesung apparently decides to lean back and bring some distance between them again.

“Are you two finished there?”, Leeteuk pipes up from behind, the smile clearly audible in his voice and Yesung and Hyukjae nearly scramble apart as they realize that they are obviously not alone in the living room.

Heechul has a wide grin plastered all over his face and his mouth is already opened to comment on the scene right there, but Leeteuk clasps his hand over Heechul’s mouth and pulls the latter’s head back until Heechul his able to look into the leader’s eyes, who is still sitting on the couch behind him. Leeteuk smiles at him warmly from atop and just holds his forefinger against his lips to signalize Heechul to stay quiet, and Heechul rolls his eyes, but nods nevertheless.

He then lets his gaze wander over the group and proposes loudly. “Next game?”.

Everyone groans in complaint.

“Please, no, I’m too tired for another one.”, Ryeowook contributes from the heap of pillows he and Kyuhyun are lounging in.

“Me too.” Donghae mumbles, he has shifted and instead of his legs he has positioned his head on Shindong's lap.

Siwon has closed his eyes and just nods his agreement along to the others statements.

“Fine.”, Heechul grumbles and makes himself comfortable against Leeteuk’s thigh again, flinching shortly as the leader strokes softly over his head for a second.

Hyukjae and Yesung have crawled back onto the couch and are now sitting close to each other, but without meeting each other’s gaze. Finally Hyukjae gathers his courage, rests his head lightly against Yesung’s shoulder and entangles his left arm with his hyung’s right one. Yesung’s eyes widen a little surprised, but then he lets himself fall back against the couch, pulls Hyukjae along with him until the younger one’s head is lying half on top of his collarbone and half on top of his chest.

“Are you feeling alright?”, Yesung asks again, his face half buried in Hyukjae’s hair and the latter can feel the others breath brushing over him.

“Yeah.”, Hyukjae just whispers, his smile is lazy and content, not as lively and excited as earlier and he lets his eyes drift shut, concentrating on the beating of Yesung’s heart beneath his head.

Hyukjae senses that he is about to lose himself in a light slumber when suddenly a hand reaches for his right one and guides it until it rests on Yesung's right thigh. Warm fingers unfold his hand, slip inside and intertwine themselves with his. Yesung's thumb is softly stroking over his skin, and Hyukjae doesn’t fight the urge to snuggle closer to his hyung's chest.

**Author's Note:**

> And as always, I'm happy about kudos or to hear what you think. So if you want to, let me know in the comments! :3 🤍  
> And thank you so much for reading! :)


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